<human>: Can you provide a brief rundown of the text in within 3 sentences?

I go to a university in a fairly big city.  The campus is very nice and usually safe, but we're surrounded on three sides by a pretty rough area.  It was a nice night so I was standing in front of my building (on a main road running through campus) while talking to my girlfriend on the phone.  Two guys (ages 17-22ish) walk up to me and ask me for the time.  Being a pretty trusting guy and not really thinking straight, I pulled my phone away from my head to tell them the time.  As soon as I looked down, goon #1 throws a haymaker and catches me right above the ear.  Unfortunately for these fools, they didn't know I've been playing hockey since I was eight and have seen my fair share of wild punches.  So in a split second I give goon #1 a right hook and send him sprawling.  Goon #2 tries to hit me, misses, then tries to grab me. I give him a stiff arm to the chest and push him off.  Now both goons are on the ground, and thinking they might have weapons or get motivated, I take off down the street with them behind me.  As soon as they realize I'm faster than them, they give up chase and start running to a car around the corner.  Well I was pissed and hopped up on adrenaline, so I started chasing THEM to try and get their license plate.  I couldn't catch it, so I just sat down and the grass and called the cops.  Told them I was fine and not to hurry.  In the end, they did their best police work and I looked at hundreds of mug shots, but to no avail.  As far as I know the goons are still at large.

The plus side: The incident was reported to the entire university through our emergency alert system.  I told a few friends it was me and word got out who the mugger-beater was. I didn't buy a drink for at least two months after that!

So, who else has a story like that.
<bot>: Two guys tried to jump me, I dropped both of them and they got nothing, got lots of free drinks afterwards.