<human>: Can you give me a shortened version of the text?

Well, not today, but Saturday, but this was amusing enough that it's worth a post.

While I went out shopping, I came across a store called the Pepper Palace or something like that. Intrigued, I walked in, and was greeted with all these spices and hot sauces. On the counter was some samples in little ketchup cups, with various hot sauces in them. I went to try out some of the ghost chili sauces, and was informed that I needed to sign a waiver. I signed it, and tried one with ghost chilis in it. Pretty hot and kinda kicking, but otherwise a solid burn. I liked it, and proceeded to look at others, when I came across a little hot sauce called the Flashbang.

You see, this store had ratings on the samples. At 10 was some made of scorpion peppers, but the grenade had a rating of 12. I thought they were joking, so I grabbed a tortilla chip and scooped a few drops onto the chip, and bit down. Only it wasn't a few drops, it was something like a squirt of ketchup's worth.

Commence immediate regret. My pupils widened as the burn started, and tears just started streaming down my face. The fires of Mordor just started spiraling throughout my mouth and my esophagus as the burn started to pick up. At this point, about two minutes in, half my face went completely numb and a headache started setting in horribly. I sat down on a bench outside of the store, and the next thing I knew, I was on a stretcher in a hospital, and my pants were covered in vomit. At this point I asked why I was in the hospital, and as it turned out, after I sat down, I proceeded to puke and passed out. After some scans and a checkup with a doctor, I was sent on my way with a recommendation to not have so much goddamn hot sauce. 

A few hours later, I discovered what is probably the inspiration for "Ring of Fire" by Johnny Cash. 10/10 would do again. Just not that much, a drop is plenty
<bot>: Burnin' For You" by Blue Oyster Cult, then "Burn" by Ellie Goulding, followed by "Ring of Fire" by Johnny Cash. Darwin would be proud.