<human>: Today, 10 minutes ago, after taking a shit, I saw shit marks in the toilet and recalled my flatmate telling me about them. So I decided to very quickly clean that shit with the brush. Why "very quickly" you say? It's because I could hear my eggs frying like motherfuckers on the frying pan and I knew I was going to fuck them up. So I took the brush, stuck it in the toilet and brushed fast and hard to clean all the shit. I hadn't realised that shoving the brush in a hole full of water could do me harm. The result of this action was that water started to splash around so high that some got on my face, bringing with it a couple of pieces of shit that got stuck in my beard.

Condense the text into a few key points
<bot>: Tried cleaning the shit out of a toilet a little too fast, splashed water so high I got pieces of shit stuck in my beard.