<human>: Give me a shortened version of the text

My wife and I have been married for almost 11 years & we have 3 kids (8,4,4mo) together.  We got married young, I was 19 and we only dated for a couple months before I asked her to marry me.  I shipped out for the Navy and we waited to get married until I had a more permanent location(about a year later.)  Now we've had our ups and downs as every relationship does, even had a period where I had moved out and she dated another guy for a short time(about 2 months.)  We both love each other a great deal but our marriage has turned into more of a roommate situation.  Early in our relationship we were very active in the bedroom and now I'm lucky if it happens quarterly.  She is on anti-anxiety meds that she says basically kill her drive and I believe her but it still sucks. Recently we have had a lot on our plate, we sold our first house together, had to move to an apartment while our new house was built, had a baby, and 2 weeks ago we moved into our new house.  My wife texted me today and asked "Do you think something is wrong w/us because we aren't really affectionate w/each other any more and with the lack of sex?"  Later in that same conversation she said something like "...if you told me that you weren't going to be affectionate w/me for the next 6 months, sure it souds sad but I don't know if I would care b/c that is just what I am use to now." Which really stung to hear. She also said she feels like we are coworkers and our job is the kids.  I don't think I could have put it any differently since it basically describes our situation pretty well.  The problem is neither one of us really know how to fix it.  

So my question is has anyone felt like their spouse was a "coworker" or "roommate" instead of a spouse?  What advice do you have and how did you get out of that rut?

Thank you very much!
<bot>: Wife of 10 years says we act more like coworkers/roommates than spouses, neither of us is happy with that being what our relationship is. Anyone had a similar situation? What helped?