<human>: I have a boyfriend right now [25M] and we've been together over a year now. 

Sometimes when he has to cancel on me for a legitimate reason, even if we saw each other a couple days ago, I have these anxiety attacks. It's triggered by a few other things, like when we have any kind of fight, when he wants me to hang out with him and his friends, who I don't dislike, when he seems disinterested in talking to me, even when I'm probably interrupting him hanging out with his friends or something. A couple times I've been worried he's dead because he couldn't text/call me back and I flip out. It's embarrassing.

This sort of response didn't start with him, it started maybe when I was in middle school. Elementary, even. I've always attached myself to one person and acted like they were the end all be all thing in my life and nothing else mattered, and, obviously if they can't hang out with me, they're going to leave me forever right?

I've recently come to realize that maybe his behaviour is normal. Maybe it's not normal to freak out when anything negative happens in a relationship. Maybe I'm actually the weird one here. I've never thought about it that way and now I feel like I've been doing everything wrong my whole life.

The worst part about this now is that I can see myself behaving this way, overreacting to the most base things, chasing the rabbit and causing myself to have these anxiety attacks, but I can't stop it. I don't know how. I don't know if I can. I wish I could, because it places a lot of unneccessary strain on me, him, and our relationship. I want to be okay with him being away from me. I've started to hate myself because of this crap,

I want to talk to him about it, but I'm afraid I'm just going to push him away or he won't understand.

I don't know. Does anyone know how to deal with this sort of thing? I'm lost.

Can you provide a brief overview of the text?
<bot>: Anxiety attacks when I can't hang out with boyfriend for any reason and other triggers. Happening for a long time now, not just recently. Don't know how to deal with my anxiety.