<human>: Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?

Before I start, let's call my cousin S and my actual girlfriend F.
So, the story with F started 3 years ago, she fell in love with me and she still is, I first tried to have a relationship with her but things didn't work out well for me, so I left her. For one year and a half she was still in love with me and after we grew up and got to know ourselves better I started to feel attracted to her, we are very similar but different at the same time. I DO love her, and I never stopped loving her since we are back together. We both kind of think that it's been like we never stoppes being together, so what I'm gonna tell you kind of cockblocks my 3 year relationship with F.

Damn, S, we were friends in childhood but we never met in more than a couple of years and she grew up like a beautiful woman: blue eyes, skinny, pale, dark hair and heavy smoker; just how I found out to like women: strong and beautiful,  innocent and guilty. She's just terrific: she lost 3 years of school for her behaviour, she hits other girls and she just does whatever she wants. Maybe it's her pale skin, her eyes or how she holds the cigarette and breath the smoke out of her lungs that she caught me in the net of love. Two things: we are *kind of* related and she's not really seeking somebody to stay with. 
It's just too many things of one head or one brain. Right now I feel insecure about doing anything with any of the two girls: F is in vacations at the moment and I have only a few days before I leave my vacation spot to go back to where I have school amd, in 10 days, I will see F again.
<bot>: I'm in a relationship for about three years and everything was going smooth until I fell in love with my cousing that I didn't see for a long time