<human>: First of all i need to say, that my english is rly bad, since im a lazy idiot from Germany. (maybe someone could remove all the misspelling. might be a lot work i guess)
Well a few days ago I fcked up with like everyone of my friends.

Well im actually in a lot Whatsapp group's. One of them is pretty much about talking pervert shit mindless brainfuck stuff and things like that. In this group there are 4 girls 1 guy and myself. Its rly like, everything that gets posted is 100% humorous pervshit and things like that. 

So last weekend, I was rly bored cause I had nothing to do on Sunday evening. So I decided to roll a nice joint. I smoked it on my couch while watching tv. It was a rly impressive "trip" and my mind was blown. It was that much nice, that I even laughed my ass of at the advertisments.

But ads are still boring so I decided to make a nice voicemail to the group. I said something like: "heya who wants a nice dick ride with some shit that went through the eye of a needle on it." And I didn't laughed at all saying this into my phone. I said it pretty serious cause I knew they will know its not serious.

Well, then the ads where over, I relaxed on the couch and fell asleep. Around 2 hours later I woke up seeing that I have 825 Mails in Whatsapp in 1 conversation. Saw that it was the group of my (ex) school class and some other friends + even a teacher. 50 People in the group and mostly no spam, just serious talking about what do to on weekends.

Well after reading about 10 of the mails which where all like "haha u freaky idiot".
So, to make it short. I accidently posted the voicemail in the serious group with serious friends, a lot older people and also some hot girls.
Well I guess, im not going out this weekend!

Give me the gist of the text in a nutshell
<bot>: Made a awkward Whatsapp Voicemail to a humorous little group of friends. Noticing that I spoke it to a very serious group of serious friends. Stoned…