<human>: Just over a year ago, I, a 6'4" man, weighed about 203 pounds and felt horribly self-conscious. I've always been overweight and it has, in combination with stretch marks, bad skin and general lack of good-looks, contributed to a lot of insecurity. After entering my now relationship of a year, I decided to cut down my eating. I dropped all the way to 154 pounds within a 6 month period and things weren't particularly great. At first I liked the fact I didn't look fat anymore but then I slowly began to hate putting food into my body - I felt disgusting and my eating habits worsened. After a short while I got on top of it and now weigh a modest, but still constant, 175 pounds. 

My problem is, as ridiculous as it may sound, that now I feel too thin and lacking masculinity. I did various body challenges for a short while and yesterday my girlfriend said "Oh you've stopped doing the arm challenge haven't you? I can tell, your arms just aren't as toned!" - she explained how she wasn't criticising me and it was just an observation. She knew it had upset me so we talked about it for a little while and she said how she still finds me really attractive.

I feel gross in my own body and it pains me to see all these other guys who go to the gym a lot and look gorgeous. I wish my girlfriend gorped over me as much as everyone does these guys. I can't afford the gym but I try to do exercise in my flat room but I normally end up giving up because I just hate looking at myself in the mirror - it completely kills my motivation.

What can I do to feel more confident and sexy? I really, *really* don't feel it.

Summarize the given text in a few sentences.
<bot>: History of poor body perception and *'eating disorders'* - I just want find some sense of inner confidence so I can actually feel sexy in my own skin. Help?