<human>: When I was a kid rarely I would go into "episodes" whenever I would lay down and turn all the lights off and get ready for sleep.
When an *episode* occurred I would have literally everything that I would think of distorted in a way and it would only progress until I turned on the lights and looked at the various items that were around me (or turn on the TV) and after about a minute of doing that the *episodes* would subside for the time being and sleep normally.

What the *episode* would consist of would be this basically. (Apologies if I seem vague) Think of anything right now, doesn't matter what it is, then imagine that thing 7358932675892689x bigger then it was before, then the next second imagine it 783624441237382x smaller then it's usual size. (I know I'm going to fuck this part up in describing it) Then have the texture of the object go from complete corrosion to indefinably smooth in the same veracity that it changes in size. Then have this happen for literally everything that comes to mind while you cannot control it until you make it subside. (As explained above)

I could usually deal with it earlier on, but lately these *episodes* have been happening more frequently and **much** more violently. (Probably every 3 days now). I've been attempting to "fight off" the *episodes* by thinking past it or some variation of that, but all attempts have been to no avail. When I try to defeat it it just gets more and more worse until I'm literally screaming into my pillow without knowing I was actually screaming because I'm no lost in my head. I still rely on turning on all the lights to make it go away.

I have no fucking clue what the hell is going on, I will not accept the idea of telling this to anyone, (Doctor, parents, Etc.) just because I EXTREMELY despise relying on other individual's pity.

Can you provide a brief overview of the text?
<bot>: Having *episodes* in the night that I cannot elaborate well in words that is getting more violent and frequent as I age.