<human>: I've been in a relationship for 8 months now, SO knows of my depression and has seen me at some low points. He's understanding about it, he's had a GF with borderline before so he knows all the signs.

He keeps saying "we'll get through this". I don't know why this bothers me every time. Maybe it's cause he says "we" or that we "get through it". There's no getting through it. This shit won't go away. And there's no "we" in depression. There's only me. And I'm dragging him down this hole. He spends more time with me and cancels friends because he's worried about me. I don't want him to. I'm hindering him from living his life and not listen to some sobbing girl cry over nothing and stay home all day.

Fuck

I noticed I'm distancing myself from him. I try to keep my depression to myself as good as I can until I'm alone so he stops being worried. I managed to do it for a month now. It's fucking exhausting. I want to tell him how I feel but then I'm in this vicious circle again of dragging him down. I feel so hopeless, lost and lonely and trapped.

One time, that was months ago, I asked if I'm draining him with my depression and he confirmed yes. I know that was a slip of tongue and he didn't really mean it in the way he said it but that confirmed my biggest fear in this relationship. Although that was 4 months ago or so, this is still in my head and stopping me from calling him.

Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?
<bot>: I'm hiding my depression so my boyfriend doesn't have to worry and can live his life. Feeling extremely lonely and pained in that process.