<human>: Provide a brief overview of the text.

We married just over a year ago and have not been able to have sex. We started dating in high school. We're both Christian and chose to save sex for marriage. Since we've been married though, I can't get myself inside her other than a finger. She's just too tight as far as I can tell. I know things are tight and rather painful for a woman's first time, but this doesn't seem normal.

One thing that's frustrating me in this situation is that I really don't know how to help. We bought a toy with interchangeable sizes, the smallest of which she can get in with significant pain. But she doesn't like the idea of me using the toy on her. She will only do it herself in private (basically during the day while I'm at work).

The other thing that frustrates me the most is that I am feeling less convinced lately that this is even a priority for her. I feel like if she won't stretch on her own and I can't help, then this is basically never going to happen. I've brought up seeing a doctor and she gets very upset because going would be embarrassing and she always feels like she's making progress with the toy. I know I wouldn't want to go either if I was having problems getting it up, but those doctors exist to help people and I don't think it should be embarrassing.

I desperately want sex to be a positive aspect of our marriage. I feel like she needs to be pushed to get things done, but I worry pushing will only kill what little desire she has to make this happen. We obviously talked about it before our marriage and I thought we were both excited for it, but now I just don't know.

Any advice you have will be appreciated. Be it physical advice for helping her stretch or something else to help me encourage her or whatever. Thanks!
<bot>: Married 1 year with physical difficulties preventing sex. I don't know how to help and my wife doesn't seem to care whether or not it ever happens.