<human>: Can you give me a shortened version of the text?

This actually happened last year, but I was reminded of it today.

I'll set the scene: at the time, I was working in a call center so we all sat on long bangs about 10 across with another bank directly in front facing and one behind, and so on in that fashion.

It was the start of my morning shift in the office and I was sat at my desk trying to find a rich vein of motivation to actually start doing some work. I stared hard at the screen with the usual glazed over, slack jawed facial expression one expects to find on an employee during a weekday in a job with no future prospects.

Suddenly I was snapped from my trance as I felt the very earth beneath me begin to move and shake. My brain was still in the middle of it's boot-up sequence and Living in the UK I could make only one logical conclusion with limited connotative ability: 'EARTHQUAKE!'

I called across to the girl who sat directly in front of me, Lets call her Sarah, "Did you feel that! I think it was an Earthquake!"

Sarah said nothing. Her eyes became wide and bore into my very soul with the intensity of a million white hot sun. "Whats her problem?" I thought, but carried on my line of inquiry with everyone else in ear shot, only to have the same looks, or sometimes facepalms returned. 

"I KNOW WHAT I FELT!" I cried, "It was mild, but it was an earthquake!" I looked back to Sarah who now had her head in her hands and was shaking her head. FINE! proof was needed it seemed, so I announced I would prove it and began searching the net for reports of any tectonic moment within the UK. 

Sarah came round to my desk and sat down next to me before quietly explaining that yes, I may have just felt the earth move but it had nothing to do with Geology, more Biology. 

In my half asleep state, I had failed to notice a rather plump woman walking past my desk, who was now sat at her's crying due to me announcing I had just felt an Earthquake....

I felt like shit for the rest of the day.
<bot>: I asked everyone if they felt the the earthquake, when it was actually a rather large woman who I made cry as a result.