<human>: My ex best friend and I were very close. I've blocked a lot of what happened due to my abuse starting in high school, but I'm sure we were nasty towards each other before then, as kids seem to be.

We both dealt with a lot early in our lives early on. It's hard for me to talk about it. He lost his dad, my dad went to prison, he lived with absent(?) mother, I dealt with my crazy sister, etc. 

I took several wrong steps when trying to do good and help him through it. I gave unwanted and generic advice. We lashed out at each other. We would often split up until we forgave each other. We would talk about each other behind our backs. All that good stuff.

Then I met Him. He was a senior when I was a freshman. I was so desperate for affection and love that I jumped at the first sign of someone taking me in. Except he used me. I didn't know how to say no, I didn't know how I should feel, I didn't know anything about my situation. So I bottled everything up until I lashed out at everyone closet to me. 

My ex best friend and I started bullying each other. He vandalized my art, I would post passive aggressive things and rant about him, he brought his family into it to attack me and talk about me publicly, etc. 

Honestly, I don't know what the right things to do here is. Maybe I should figure that out, but I don't know how. I've gone through my life with my world turning upside down. 

I want to apologize since it's long overdue and he deserves to have an apology from me since I don't know if I gave one. I just want what is best for him. Maybe I should just stay in the shadows and try to keep moving on? 

If I left out any information, please feel free to ask.

Can you condense the text into three sentences or less?
<bot>: I fucked up. I want to apologize since I don't know if I ever gave one but his best interests are my first priority.