<human>: i work at a liquor store and it is incredibly boring.  i'm aloud to do pretty much whatever i want.  and i have been trying to find ways to screw with customers.  i have pulled back a ceiling tile and put the cardboard cutout of snoop dog for colt45 blast peeking out.  and the other day i cut my finger and had a band aide on it.  when customers asked what happened (and they did frequently)  i would tell them that my girlfriend was pregnant and my kid bit me last night.  i then go on to confide in them that i am worried this means my soon to be kid doesn't like me.  once i even managed to get some tears up when a middle age lady took me 100% seriously and talked with me for about 30 minutes about how i will be a great dad and the kid will love me.  any more ideas?

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: i work at a liquor store where i can do pretty much anything i want.  how can i screw with the customers/ kill time?