<human>: Can you give me a shortened version of the text?

**Or at least, I really wish that's how it happened.  It didn't.  Turns out I was right [when I posted this thread] .  I missed her long-time lover by just under 15 minutes.**

Kudos to spicy_jose for [suggesting this clever title in the original thread](
<bot>: Life could be so much simpler if it had been a mis-understanding.  It wasn't.  She was cheating, hiding, and using our family's money to do it.