<human>: Provide a brief overview of the text.

For a while now I have been more or less mindless. I went to work, I came home and I sat on my computer, when I went out I stared at my phone or something else.

 This summer my brother died, the year before my dad died, when I was 18 my other brother died and when I was 11 my mom died. I have struggled for a long time and I had shut down to the point that I was shutting out those I love.

My wife had avoided me for about a week recently and I started to freak out as it all came boiling out, we had a serious talk on Thursday night and I think it was a good start but I feel absolutely horrible. 

I am flooded with guilt and every other emotion. I dont want to lose her and I am scared to death that I might fuck it up. She said she would never leave me and that she loves me and she knows I love her but that she wants to feel it from me that I am in love with her. I have found a free walk in therapist but they are not open until monday and I feel like my whole life is falling apart around me now. She means everything to me and I would be completely lost without her but I fucked up big time in not interacting with her how I should have, I locked up my emotions and was a robot for the longest time that I can barely contain my emotions now. 

I am sorry if this rambles, I have been breaking down and sobbing and it makes it hard to function.
<bot>: I have been distant for my wife for a while but I am trying to make amends, I am so scared of fucking up.