<human>: Could you distill the essence of the text into 1-3 sentences?

We're sitting out back of our apartment complex and this guy brings his pit bull out off leash and starts telling us about how his dog recently got in a scuffle and what not and BOOM, out of nowhere this other dog goes straight for my dogs throat and starts crushing it like a motherfucker. My girlfriend starts crying and everyone is standing back screaming so I jumped in the middle, got my hands in the dogs mouth, and managed to pry the jaws off so my dog could get away while my hands got eaten up. He got away with nothing but a chewed bit ear. He looks a bit Holyfield now but is cool and happy as ever again. I was then informed I'm getting awesome sex out this heroic act.
<bot>: Saved my dog from a viscous attack, got my hands all eaten up, but earned awesome sex for it.