<human>: Obviously a throw away, and I've never really written anything here, but I can't seem to figure this out and wanted to hear if maybe this is something normal or something.

I'm a 23M and I met a 23F over OKCupid around the middle of September. We went on a few awkward dates now, up to our fourth yesterday night where we kissed at the end. It's been a slow relationship, and I've been okay with that.

The entire time we've been casually dating though, I've found myself questioning whether or not I'm actually attracted to her. When i'm with her, I feel very happy and genuinely enjoy being around and close to her. I don't find myself embarrassed to be with her or anything, and that seems perfect. But the moment we're apart I seem to start questioning how interested in her I actually am. I almost have trouble just picturing what she even really looks like. It all hit a little heavier than usual last night when after finally kissing her on my way back to my own place I realized that I didn't really feel anything I expected myself to. No butterflies. No...spark, I guess.

I still was out with her for hours and hours, genuinely laughing and having a good time and flirting, but now i'm up having trouble picturing us together at all just like every time I go back home. Now i'm worried about whether i'm trying to convince myself to like her because i'm desperately lonely and think this will fix things, or if this is a normal thing in relationships and the stronger feelings will get obvious later. There's also the matter that i'm white and she's black, and part of me is worried maybe being even LESS use to this kind of situation and living in a southern area that I might be projecting some kind of vague subconscious racism into this.

The worst part being that she's told me about her own loneliness and depression and now I feel like it'd be cruel to give a 'I don't actually like you' out of nowhere. Especially given that I've now made it clear our relationship is romantic.

Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?
<bot>: Things finally became romantic between me and her and I don't seem to feel anything. I can't tell if I just WANT to like her, or if I actually do and I don't know if feeling like this is normal.