<human>: I'm a young adult male, and I've had the same basic haircut for much of my life: short back and sides, and a bit longer on top. Pretty much the classic "nerdy" haircut. But I'm not a nerd... I want to care about the way I look but I have just never known exactly what makes for a "good" haircut.

I have a very large, round face (though I'm not fat), with a big forehead and a slightly receding hairline. My hair also seems quite thin. I'd say my face shape is similar to the guy [here] Incidentally, my hair could look like his, too, only shorter, if I gelled it.

So please tell me: how does one go about getting "good" hair? Is there some secret to making it glossy, thick, and stylish? Products that guys use every day to wash or style it? And am I supposed to grow it out a bit and only have the tips cut off? I usually just get it cut really short all over and have a kind of "bowl cut" thing going on.

Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?
<bot>: I burned the place to the ground but saved all the koalas, and didn't get charged for the public urination.