<human>: So this didn't happen today but rather a few years ago. 

At the time, I owned a samsung galaxy s1. It was an awesome phone but being over a year old it was starting to crap out. Like most people I know, I use my phone to wake up for work in the morning, until one fateful day when it finally decided to crap out completely. 
I'm a heavy sleeper and I don't wake up to much of anything... so I needed a replacement alarm for work the next day. It was too late to go buy an alarm clock and obviously getting another phone that quick was out of the question. Instead I remembered my iPod and promptly downloaded an alarm app on my ipod touch. Going through the settings I naturally chose the rooster alarm.
I was skeptical about this idea as the iPod touch's speakers were pretty shitty and I didn't think it would wake me up. This is where I FU, genius me decides to hook my ipod up to my computer speakers, crank them full blast and move them closer to my pillow.. even though the speakers were right beside my bed already. I go to sleep thinking my idea is foolproof. 
6am and I wake up in level 10 panic mode to a rooster screaming in my ear. My brain that isn't awake yet tells me to start screaming for whatever reason. In my screaming panic I stand up and stick my hand into my ceiling fan spinning at top speed. I trip on the floor, fall on my coffee table and smack my head on my tv. Went to work that day with a messed up wrist and tinnitus. I honestly don't know what I expected... not a huge FU but looking back it's kinda funny.

Can you condense the text into three sentences or less?
<bot>: hooked rooster alarm up to computer speakers at full volume, woke up screaming, sprained my wrist, pooped a little and went to work with the most incredible ringing in my ears.