<human>: I've been with my boyfriend for three and a half years now, since we were both 16. 
We've had so many problems, mainly him fucking up time and time again. He's broken my heart so many times over unforgivable issues and we've broken up a couple times and we've got back together. I can't seem to let him go though. 
Lately, I've finally realized he's really not good for me. He's lazy, boring, messy, slobbish, unreliable, unloyal, and untrustworthy. I'm the complete opposite from him in every way.  
I've recently been flirted with a couple times this week, and it feels *amazing* and it's a super confidence booster. I keep fantasizing what it would be like to date other men and daydreaming about everything I could achieve without the boyfriend in my life. I've even practiced over and over different break ups I could have.  
But I hate the thought of being alone; not having a partner. I can't stand not talking to someone throughout the day. Just talking, about the small events that have happened through the day, little excitements I've encountered, and random thoughts that run through my mind. If I have a bad day, he's my go-to person. If I feel like I look amazing, he's the person I'll send a picture to. I guess maybe I just like the attention.
I don't even want to be with him anymore, I'm done with him and I'm done with all the pain he's put me through, and I want to move on with my life. Any time I'm about to end the shitty excuse of a relationship, the thought of loneliness pulls me back. And also the thought of losing my best friend brings me back to him.

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: I'm with someone who I don't want to be with anymore. But I feel like I can't leave (though I really want to) because I don't want to be lonely. I'm a selfish person.