<human>: Can you condense the text into a few key points?

My husband and I have been married 2 years, together about 8.  I'm not particularly close to his family.  We only met a handful of times before the wedding.  I know he talks a lot about me, and they are gracious hosts when I'm there, but I'm not really a daughter to them or anything.  My husband and I visited my family a bit more often, but we mostly just went home separately to our respective houses when we weren't away at college.

When we graduated and moved in together, we moved pretty far away from both families.  We both work full time and get 10 days vacation each.  We have five days that we use for odd days we might need it, or a small trip.  The other five we reserve for Christmas and Thanksgiving.  

We still split holidays.  He goes to his family's house, and I go to mine.  It's always worked for us since by this time we really miss our families.  I thought both sides were okay with it, but I recently got a facebook message from my husband's sister (22F) who asked if I was coming for Thanksgiving.  I said I wouldn't be able to make it.  She said "figures."

His mom has also been calling more often and making passive-aggressive jabs at me not spending holidays with them.  Am I wrong for not going over there?  Are they going to seriously resent me if I don't go until we have children?

My husband thinks I should just go and show my face to keep the peace, but the holidays are the only time I get to see my parents and younger sister.  I'm not sure if I'm ready to give that up just yet for a family that never seemed keen on my company in the first place.
<bot>: Due to distance and lack of vacation time, my husband and I split holiday visits.  His family is beginning to dislike this.  Am I wrong here?