<human>: Long back story short, when my grandma died I moved in with my grandpa to help him with life stuff like not being alone and sad or how to turn on his computer and stuff like that. 

Well, my cousin lived with my grandparents and is just a royal screw up. Druggie dropout who is wasting his life and using up all my grandparents money. He is such an airhead that living with him is terrible. He does stuff all the time that annoys the shit out of me. He finishes off the TP at least twice a week and doesn't replace it. He sleeps through his alarm which wakes me up (I have to go into his room and unplug it from the wall after 45 minutes) constantly. Goes in and out of his room (Door Open/Door Close), goes to the bathroom (Door Open/Door Close), then goes outside (Door Open/Door Close) over and over and over again late at night (Like 1am or later), not being quiet about it at all. I am usually still up just watching tv in bed, but it's so annoying here him do it 9 times an hour (that's over 50 door noises I hear!) He just has no common sense or sense of consideration.

So my petty revenge... Whenever he's outside (He and his underage girlfriend go smoke in his car a bunch) and I pass by the front door, I make sure to lock them out (he always has his keys on him). What makes it so satisfying is that I lock the handle AND the dead bolt! Zing! You think you're all done after unlocking the handle and try to open the door? Think again. spend that extra 8 seconds unlocking the dead bolt too, kid.

Condense the text into a few key points
<bot>: Cousin is an unconsiderate loser. When he goes outside I make him have to unlock the door handle AND deadbolt to get back in. Twice as long to come inside.