<human>: Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?

My 7 year old nephew recently built a bird feeder in school and asked me if I could hang it up in my tree out in my front yard. I of course replied with "Absolutely!" but now looking back at it, I wish I had said "FUCK NO."

Basically after my nephew left to go home with his mother, I hung up the bird feeder and went to get some bird food from the local Lowes. After my short trip, I filled it up with my newly purchased bird chow and went inside to go about my day.

The very next fucking day, I see a whole army of these sons of bitches in the front of my yard swarming at the big ass bag of bird food that I left outside in front of my garage door. How long have they been there I do not fucking know but when I actually got outside to confront this battalion of foul as a one man army, nearly the bag was toppled over and a mountain of bird seed was piled in front of my garage with every bird in the fucking neighborhood probably piled around it. 

To them it looked like a buffet, but to me it looked like a nuclear bomb amount of bird turd that was going to fly onto my car. So I as fast as I could threw both my slippers at the group and proceeded to BONZAI rush at the flock. I have to say that I was victorious in my last stand.

The lesson I learned: I'm retarded for leaving the bird food out, and fuck birds.
<bot>: I bought bird food and put it into my feeder. The birds said fuck the feeder and went for the bag that I stupidly left open in the front of my garage.