<human>: Can you condense the text into a few key points?

So last night I took alot of Ambien, I can't remember the exact amount because that particular drug tends to fuck with one's memory. I was trying to sleep, so I took one, and I was still not sleepy, so I took two, and then I don't remember anything. This morning I woke up, feeling pretty groggy and noticed that the bottle was half empty and there was a document open on my laptop titled "Profound Revelations." I read it, and it was a few short stories, poems, and nuggets of wisdom that I must have written while I was high as a kite. There was a bunch of stuff about personal fulfillment and other hippie bullshit like that, and at the time I thought it was pretty neat. So tonight, I proceeded to get inebriated again, thinking I would have the same sort of transcendent experience. Nope. I wound up sending a copy of the wisdom in the document to an assortment of people, including my current girlfriend, my ex, and my English teacher, submitting part of it as an assignment on self reflection. One of my friends pointed out that one of my so-called pearls of wisdom was a famous quote. I did a few quick searches and soon discovered that every single piece of writing in that document was copied and pasted and could be found by searching "deep shit for when your high" on google. I'm totally fucked for this assignment, which is a direct quote from the Art of Happiness. So much for drugs expanding one's mind.
<bot>: Got really high and copied and pasted deep stuff into a document, sobered up, forgot about it, found it again and thought I was a genius. Probably going to fail English as a result.