<human>: Can you condense the text into a few key points?

Ok, so a little back story- At the time I was a fairly inexperienced 14 year old guy who didn't know much about puberty or sex at the time. Cue the story.

Ok, so it's getting around time to go to bed for school tomorrow. I hop in the shower, look down, and my vision seemed a little....*fuzzy*. Wow. Dang. It was a *jungle* down there. Nothing recognizable but a size-able oak tree, if I say so myself. I jump out real quick, grab a disposable razor and go at it. I made sure to lift the drain clog before I started. 5 minutes later, my work is done. I kicked the water towards the drain to wash away all the, erm, *shavings*, and proceeded to finish my shower and get out.

Fast forward 3 hours. My parents get home from a long day of grocery shopping. My mom hops in the shower as I finish my sub from Subway. 

"WHO SHAVED THEIR PUBES IN THE SHOWER?!" She belts at the top of her voice, shaking the house like an earthquake. My face goes beat-red, I start panicking, thinking of same lame excuse to get myself out of this. My mind is racing and my head feels like I ate a chili pepper. I decide to take the trash out just so I can take off for 20 minutes to get my thoughts together. But alas, no sad excuse I could ever make up was going to work.

I went home, and decided to face the music. My parents narrowed it down pretty fast. Now, I was *darn* sure I washed it *all* away. They forced me to open up about why I did it. So I was honest with them. They said how that was such an "adult" action that I took. They then told me they'd considered grounding me for doing something so, "grown up," but decided to let me off the hook.

That was the longest and most awkward 1hr 1/2 of my life.
<bot>: Shaved my pubes in the shower and didn't clear all the evidence. My parents corner me, and I have a close shave with punishment.