<human>: I'm currently in a long term relationship with a man that I thought I had fallen in love with. We've been together for years and I was considering him as a life partner (at some point after college or whenever). He's the first person I ever bonded with on this level. He is pretty much my best friend. But the problem is I lost the attraction to him and I cheated on him with another man. I admitted my infidelity and we decided to try to work things out. He is the perfect guy and an amazing boyfriend. He has admitted to me that he would like to try to make this a life long commitment. I love the idea of spending the rest of my life with him. 

However, I have been thinking about this other man ever since it happened. I'm not a superficial person but he isn't even better looking. He was good and I feel we connected outside of that on a deeper level and some sort of feelings grew. He has said that he misses me and wishes we could still hang out. He wants a relationship but I don't know what I want. I can't stop thinking about him despite the fact that I promised to have nothing to do with him anymore. I've written a pro and con list and the current boyfriend is the perfect man that I've wanted but the attraction level just isn't there despite the fact that he is more attractive than the "other man". 

Overall, I'm afraid I'm making the wrong choices. I feel like I'm young and I have no clue what I want in a partner and it will take a long time to find the "right" person. The problem with going down the path of the normal college girl and dating guys without lots of commitments is that I feel stable in this relationship. He is an amazing man and I am proud to be his girlfriend but I am ashamed of my actions and my straying feelings.

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: Not attracted to the perfect man and want life long commitment but attracted to the unperfect man and not sure about future.