<human>: Hey Reddit, Throw away account for obvious reasons. 

I'm a popular guy, in my mid twenties, never had trouble with women or making friends. People like me, and I've been told I have good charisma. However, I can't keep friends. I can not think of one close friend I've ever had in my life. I've dated girls upwards of four years, and never felt really close to them in that span, and the worst part is I usually end up actively pushing away people who get too close to me because they somehow irk my annoyances.

Here's a good example.

I was at a party last night with some people who consider me a friend, and they were drunk and stupid. There is this girl who... loves me. She wants a relationship with me, and I've been warming up to the idea. She got drunk, and started getting flirty and otherwise just stupid drunk, we've all been there. I'm not the jealous type, at all. But the way she acted, and the feeling that I had to take care of her really just triggered my annoyance of people.. This morning, I told her... flat out that I couldn't handle that. I can not handle having to deal with the neurosis of others, and even though we weren't yet together. I flat out told her I couldn't ever date someone like her. She cried, and said she couldn't talk to me right now.

Now listening to this, you might see it as justified, I mean, who wants a girl who gets drunk and stupid? Here's the addendum: I've known her for five years, and it's the first time I'd ever seen her do this.

I really liked this girl, and I actually was excited to be with her. But... it's almost like I was looking for excuses to not like her, and hopped on the first one I found, regardless of how horrible it was.

The worst part is I'm becoming increasingly more lonely in my life.

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: I've never had problems making friends or getting in relationships, but I actively look for reasons to push away and end them. Even in doing this, I am completely lonely and wish I could find a way not to do this.