<human>: This happened yesterday, I posted it yesterday but it was removed for the content.

I'm still scared shitless. Damn. Here we go.

I entered the washroom because I urgently needed to take a dump. And there it was. Fucking cockroaches.

I'm usually dead scared of them, and whenever I see one I call my mom to kill it.(Laugh all you want, those motherfuckers climbed on my head once)

But I really needed to take that dump, so I took some tissue paper and picked that Lil' shit. Flushed the Lil' shit. Shat. In between my shit. That Lil' shit somehow climbed back, waddled through my shit and climbed up my ass.

I'm still shuddering. I stood up and let out a supersonic shriek and went absolutely bonkers. I grabbed toilet paper and randomly jammed it around my ass. The first two times it went dangerously close to the hole. I even got shit on my hand. Once I got that asshole, I flushed him/her for about 200 hours. 

After leaving the washroom, visibly shaken, my mum asked, "what happened, IBurnedMyBalls?" After explaining, she went hysterical and couldn't stop laughing. 
Just like my brother and my dad.

Great, I needed more reason to be the laughing stock, *again*

I will let random strangers watch me shit on the road, but I'm not shitting in the washroom again.

Its not going to go unheard in family gatherings. 

All my embarrassing stories involve fucking shitting.

Fucking cockroach.

Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?
<bot>: I went apeshit on my ass because the roach I flushed crawled its way back, waddled through my shit and climbed up to my ass