<human>: Give me the gist of the text in a nutshell

Just for clarification, this is thoughts I have and I have trouble sharing things with people verbally, and just in general. So this is basically the only place I will have shared it.

The girl I dated from around november to may, she was a beautiful chinese girl, I was 17 at the time, and she was 14. She was absolutely perfect for me, we got along perfectly. We were about an hour and 15 minutes apart and my car couldnt make it that far because it was pretty crappy to be honest, so I had to borrow my mothers car. Everything was going so well until my ex came back into my life, who had dumped me for her ex. It was coming up on my 18th birthday and my parents were pushing me to break up with the girl (i loved her I didn't want to do it) because I was turning 18 and she was going on 15. Plus the distance started to bother me, and the fact that my ex was coming back in the picture. And stupid me went with it. I dumped her, for the dumbest reasons ever. I just stopped. Did I not love her anymore? Why of course I still loved her. 

Months later. The relationship with my ex has fallen apart, and the girl I left is with another guy from my town. The break up kills me every day. I've developed depression and anxiety. I have flashbacks of moments together at random times in the day and it just gives me anxiety. The slightest smell triggers a flashback to a day with her. I know it sounds stupid but it feels like a soldier with PTSD, but with a freaking relationship. I kill myself every day thinking I left a girl I still love for stupid fucking reasons. The girl I am STILL in love with, is never coming back, will never want me again, will never ever EVER be mine again, and I just fucking threw it away. Because I'm too much of a pussy to suck up a few things like distance.
<bot>: I left my girlfriend, I regret it deeply, and it is haunting my everyday life, hendering me from doing anything productive.