<human>: I am currently in high school as a junior and she is a freshman but being older because she was held back. The initial reason she broke up with me: she felt that I was not putting any effort into our relationship, we talked and got back together 4 days later.

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2 days after that she called me on skype and we argued over the same things and she claimed she just couldn't do it anymore. I felt crushed, she was my best friend and we were so close, I expressed to her how much she meant to me, how much I cared. 

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I don't know if I'm feeling this way because i've never experienced this much hurt. She put me through the same tear-filled arguments twice, I thought it hurt the first time but the second time was so much worse. Her friends say she is equally hurt.

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I can't seem to find happiness in any form, I won't find someone else. I would trade anything for her back , this seems lame but it's how I truly feel. I can't cope with this any longer, I don't seem to have an appetite and I am seriously scared at this point.

Summarize the given text in a few sentences.
<bot>: My first real relationship ended, I feel terrible and I'm scared for myself. I want to go back but I know I can't.