<human>: Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?

So my friend spent the summer on the most boring job imaginable working for Serco. You might not have heard of them but they are a HUGE company working in all sorts of sectors you never thought possible (including helping to privatise the UK justice system). It killed him every day he went, partly because the job was terrible, partly because it took him 3 hours round trip every day, partly because his life's ambition of having a well-paid office job and having money suddenly wasn't so appealing. 
Anyway, the only good thing he took away from this job was a crappy little mug that he cherished as some sort of metaphor for all the lessons he learnt that summer. Today, I broke that metaphor, and I was sorry, but sorry doesn't glue mugs back together.
He is a hard man to anger, but this was oddly too much. The only way he can be recompensed is for the mug to be replaced by a mug that is WAY better. As it is his 21st next month I can afford to spend a bit of money on it. It can be purely superficially way better (like, an electric mug?) or more abstractedly an improvement (e.g. the mug was used by Churchill at Yalta).
Please post your ideas....HERE *insert downward arrow
<bot>: Today I broke my friend's mug which held a lot of value for him and I need to replace it with something unspeakably more awesome or he will never forgive me.