<human>: My and my friend have been best friends since freshman year of highschool. Ever since the end of freshman year we've always had some feelings for each other but she's had a boyfriend for the first couple years. they eventually broke up and I waited for her for a long time while she got over the relationship and felt like she was ready to move on. so eventually in january this year we started hooking up for a week but stopped abruptly because i said i wasn't ready for a relationship anymore. the reason for this is because A. we're incredibly close friends and I feel the relationship would ruin that in the end. B, she is somewhat bigger than me and my teenage self centered brain can't really shake that factor. And C because she is in love with me and i love her but not in love. So we started having sex under the condition that we don't have sex with any other people and we don't hook up with people from school. we set these rules because she felt that if I did something with someone else she would look stupid and be hurt by my action. now the problem is in her words, if we stop what we're doing now our friendship will never be the same because we've always had this sort of sexual emotional tension throughout our friendship and i'm worried that any serious decision i make will result in me losing my best friend. So I don't really know what to do because i love her she's my best friend and I don't want to be in a committed relationship with her because of personal reasons.

I'm really just asking for advice and opinions thanks :)

Can you give me a shortened version of the text?
<bot>: in a friends with benefits esque relation with highschool best friend and we argue very often because she's in love and i'm not really there.