<human>: A little back info, We are both divorced, and have kids from previous marriages (I have a 6yr old daughter and so does she).  Both our ex's were the ones to have an affair.

About every 2 - 3 weeks, we are fighting, and like most couples we have intimate knowledge of the other persons faults, and insecurities.  When we fight, we tend to throw them at the other person.  Example, Her father is very strict, and cold emotionally and has the opinion that my wife is overly emotional, or My ex wife was a stripper in her late teens, and had long since abandoned that lifestyle before our daughter was born.  When we fight, we use these things to hurt the other person.   

The fights always seem (to me) to start out of nothing, I lack empathy, or respect for other's emotions, I think people should just "get over it" if they were offended by someones words.  I don't know why I am that way, and after I have hurt that person, and I have time to reflect I always feel horrible for invalidating that persons emotions.  My wife has a temper that results to her yelling and screaming, throwing things and hitting objects. When she calms down she is very apologetic, and always apologizes of her actions. 

We both do love each other, but these faults of ours are taking a permanent toll on our relationship, and I think it might be over... I don't want to lose her, but we both don't trust each other that these fights won't happen again. 

I am meeting with a therapist tomorrow, but I fear it might be too late, she may not want to even give us a chance anymore...

Condense the text into a few key points
<bot>: We fight horribly every two weeks, I'm emotionally insensitive, which causes my wife to lose her temper.  How do we stop the madness, restore trust, and begin loving again?