<human>: Give me a shortened version of the text

Long story but bear with me.

Okay when I was in high school I met this guy online and we basically fell in love. I knew him for many years long distance and we are each others first relationship. A month after I graduated high school I moved in with him in another state away from my family.

This is where it gets complicated. It's been 5 years since then and I haven't flourished at all. Never had a job (I have bad social anxiety), haven't met any new friends, haven't really done anything. Also I am feeling very guilty for abandoning my family and siblings to live states away. I missed seeing my siblings grow into teens, parents getting older, ect......I visit them a couple times a year via plane though.

I really really love the guy I am with and our relationship is great. But he cannot move to my family's state due to his work.

I feel like I am constantly being pulled in 2 directions. Here, and my family.

I'm scared of planting my roots where I live here, probably why I haven't flourished, because I am so guilty for leaving my family and missing them.

My Mom even made me promise to never get pregnant until I live in her state. Not that I want to have kids soon.......but if I ever do....how will that work out? Either my family will miss out on seeing the baby grow up, or my partner's family will miss out (if we ever moved to my families state).

I really really don't know what to do. I am so conflicted and on a daily basis feel like I made the wrong choice coming here. **BUT I LOVE MY PARTNER.** I don't want to break it off! Plus, my family loves him too.

If I moved back in with my parents for whatever reason, I'd no longer have a room and would have to live in the basement. That's not even ideal.

I'm 23 now and feel like a loser who made a terrible choice the second I graduated high school. I should have waited to move, but it's too late to go back now.

I need any advice you can give me.
<bot>: Moved in with my long distance boyfriend in another state straight out of high school. Have not flourished. Feel guilty every day for abandoning my family.