<human>: So this didn't happen today, it happened a few years ago back when I was around 14.

I had just gotten a new laptop and it was the first ever device that was able to sort of run games such as CS:GO, obviously I got addicted to it straight away and decided to not sleep that night.

One thing I always get when I decide to stay up for a long time is a special kind of white yoghurt because I love it and it keeps me awake.

SO here I was, 3 AM still awake playing CS:GO drinking my yoghurt. If you know CS:GO you know it can be a bit ragey when you die in a dumb way, this happened to me, and this is where it went wrong.

I slammed my desk in rage, not thinking of my drink I made it fall over and caused all of the yoghurt to create a giant spot of big icky goo onto my pants. 
Seeing as I was playing CS:GO I had to think fast, no towels close to me and I can't sit in a puddle of yoghurt, so I did what anyone would do and took my pants off.

At this point it was 4AM and the yoghurt turned into a nice white dry spot which could be mistaken to be anything.. **anything**

It being 4AM and way past my bedtime I couldn't be too loud as I might wake up my parents, sadly I failed and one of them woke up. Seeing as people can see when there's a light on in my room I decided to lower the screen of the laptop so it would look like I was asleep, sadly I failed once again. 
My mom walked in, asking why I was still up, but midway her sentence she spotted me sitting there with my white stained pants taken off and my laptop screen lowered so no one could see what was on it. She immediately left and closed the door thinking she just walked in on her son masterubating and covering his pants with seaman.
The next day made for an awkward dinner and tried to ignore the subject, I haven't mentioned "The yoghurt incident" to this day.

Could you distill the essence of the text into 1-3 sentences?
<bot>: Raged at CS:GO at 3AM and caused it to look like I was masterubating over my pants.