<human>: My Dad has always been pre occupied with a bit of drinking and working. There's always been tension that my Mum spoils me (and my two sisters). There's been instances in the past when my Mum has said that my Dad said he wanted a better relationship with us.

He's quite an aggressive person and can sometimes explode, it's happened to me twice and it works on a humiliation and sometimes a violent level (eg. once I accidentally hit him with a mandarin in a joking way then he angrily threw a set of tongs at my head). I really struggle to deal with his outbursts but I also understand that it's the way he deals with his emotions.

Recently my Nan (my Mums Mum) passed away and I had to take some time off work as I wasn't coping, I returned home to stay with my parents (I no longer live with them). My Mum was out of hearing range and he asked me to come and turn a light off. The light was closer to him and I jokingly called him lazy. He then retaliated with 'you have no right to call me fucking lazy' in a really aggressive tone. (alluding to the fact that I had to take time off work. I brought this up with my Mum and she validated my feelings but also defended his actions.

At the funeral I had recently had a break up with my boyfriend. Both of my sisters are in long term relationships. I had no one to support me there as my mum was very upset and relying on my dad for comfort. I feel like it was my Dads role to comfort me but instead didn't speak to me for the duration of the day and at the wake.

He constantly complains that I don't go home when he's there/ I never see him but it's because I don't feel the need to as he has never made an effort with me. I often feel like he doesn't like/care for me and it hurts my feelings immensely. I don't feel as though I can bring it up with him either, because he would probably get defensive and blame me or It would cause me great anxiety only to have it brushed off.

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<bot>: not very close with my dad/don't feel like he likes me. Tips and advice on approaching this sort of thing?