<human>: I have experienced a very distressing pattern in my past relationships, including my previous marriage and my current marriage.

  The relationships usually start off well with me being able to keep any minor anxiety problems I have in check.  I try to be open with my partners and we get along quite well for maybe a year at most.  

The pattern I've noticed is after the honeymoon phase is over, quite frankly the sex in the relationship dies down a lot, which I think is somewhat normal.  This has occurred in all 3 of my past relationships and usually day to day living stress is given as the explanation.  In my last marriage I pushed the issue too hard and I try to avoid doing so in my current marriage because of it.  I can understand how stress can affect people and am more than willing to wait, sex isn't everything in a relationship after all.

However, it seems at some point there after I start to notice my previous significant other developing new strong (and sometimes flirty) friendships with other men.  This triggers my abandonment issues big time.  I start questioning my trust in the relationship.  I also focus obsessively on what the other men have that I don't and how I have to improve in order to keep my SO.   I get to the point where I just think it's a matter of time before she leaves and whether or not I should end it before it gets there.  Is this normal?  Am I even being rational about this?  Should I leave my current marriage because I feel my wife has lost her attraction to me?

Can you succinctly summarize the text in 1-3 sentences?
<bot>: sex slows down, wife/gf appears attracted to other men (doesn't admit to it), frequently chats with them, what should I do?  This has happened to me 3 times now.