<human>: We broke up 8-9months ago now. I was distraught for a long time, made all the stupid first time deep love mistakes of begging/pleading.

The whole period since breakup has been very hot and cold. I still love her insanely but what she put me through at my lowest point i don't think i could get over, despite how awful i was during our last few months.

Everytime we see eachother i'm either too polite or i pretend to have not seen her. Things have very much been awkward.

She messaged me today moaning about insulting her about her hair colour when all i said is i preferred it the colour she had it when we were together, that she wants it to be civil and that she really misses the friendship.

I can't do this though, because i love her. It's too hard. Worst thing is though we live in a small town with so many mutual connections its unreal.

Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?
<bot>: I love this girl but friends is too hard for me, i don't know what to do and i can't avoid her.