<human>: Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?

This is a bit of a long set-up, but I hope you'll find the payoff worth it.

First thing to know:  I'm majorly frugal and a big-time planner, so I buy Christmas presents throughout the year when I find them cheap, and then wrap them and stash them in closets until the actual holiday.

Second thing to know:  My three-year-old son knows I hide presents in closets all over the house, so he's gotten really interested in checking out everything in every closet.  (I had to explain to him just last week that a breast pump is not a toy.)

So, my son finds a box of small items wrapped in shiny green paper in the master bathroom closet.  Nifty!  There are lots of them, so it's probably okay to open just one.  Hey, check it out...it's fluffy and has a long string.  These must be new toys for the kitten!
<bot>: I walk in a room to find my toddler dangling a tampon in front of the cat, who is batting at and chewing on it.