<human>: Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?

So, I have a boyfriend. I love my boyfriend. I get a warm fuzzy feeling inside when I'm with my boyfriend. And I get the same warm fuzzy feeling when I'm near my best friend. More than once I've been late for work because I was having a dream that me and my best friend were together. We met years ago, I had a crush on him at the beginning but he wasn't into me like *that*, so we became friends, then best friends. I can't help stare at him sometimes - he's beautiful! Sometimes I just want to grab him and kiss him, other times I fantasize that he would grab me and kiss me. I've been close to telling him everything a few times, when we get drunk, but I can never bring myself to do it. One time, some (sex) stuff happened between me and some other guy at a bar and my friend saw us and he rushed outside saying he was so grossed out he almost puked. I can never forget that, the time he admitted I'm disgusting to him. But I still see some twinkle in his eye when he sees me - it must be wishful thinking, right...?
<bot>: I have an amazing boyfriend but could never get over a crush on my best friend and I just want to kiss him (my friend).