<human>: And girls, what would you like to give to your dearly beloved? 

Tomorrow the 6th of Sept, me and my Dude are celebrating our 2nd Anniversary. The problem is, we're on the parallel sides of the globe and I really can't send anything to him via post. He's quite depressed for the last few days and I really would like to cheer him up even just for a bit. Oh, another problem, his laptop broke recently so the only means of actually communicating with him is by cellular phone. And the idea of phone sex absolutely turns him off, so that's not on the menu :( 

Thanks so much, Reddit!

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: I'd like to cheer up the love of my life, but I don't know how in a LDR and only by means of a phone.