<human>: First let me say I truly love my husband. I've been with him since I was 17 (yes there's an age difference but it's always been legal in my state). I enjoy our sex life too, it's not crazy newlywed sex (especially as at have 2 kids) but we do have very passionate hot sex and are compatible in every way in and out of the bedroom. 

That being said, I've found myself becoming increasingly attracted to women. It started with me watching almost exclusively lesbian porn, but had progressed into a desire to try being with a woman. I discussed it with my husband and he told me that while he would enjoy watching me with another woman, the idea of me being with one without him there is completely off the table, even though I've tried to explain that I don't want to be watched and feel like a performer my first time, though I'd be very open to the idea subsequent times. Threesomes are currently off the table as we are both jealous people. I put it out of my mind other than the porn, and dismissed it. 

However...  now I have developed serious sexual feelings about a new female friend of mine, and I think she feels the same. People are always saying we're flirting or asking if we're dating. I initially thought she was just a touchy girl. I would NEVER cheat on my husband, and I know same-sex sex is cheating. but damn if I don't want to just fuck this girl's brains out. I'm not a lesbian and don't want to date her or leave him. I just want to experience this part of my sexuality. I don't know if I'm looking for advice or just to get this off my chest, but I can't tell anybody else. If you've read all this, thank you.

Provide a brief overview of the text.
<bot>: I want to have sex with a woman but my husband won't let me unless he is there to watch,  and I won't just go behind his back, yet I'm not entirely  comfortable with that condition.