<human>: From reading this subreddit, I know full honesty will get me the best advice so here goes:

Growing up I was the skinny, pretty friend out of us. I silently took pride when other people made comments about it or that I rocked a dress better than her. In a sick, twisted way it made me feel confident. 

I have recently gained the freshman 40 and let my general appearance go. Due to stress of freshman year I couldn't keep up with the hottest trends or even my skin care routine. Wrinkles and dark circles everywhere. 

Now that it's Summer, I started hanging out with my old friend again and she looks amazing. Her skin cleared up and she learned fashion/hair/etc. But the biggest difference is her body. She has lost a lot of weight and toned. I think her birth control even made her boobs bigger(?).

I couldn't help but feel envious when people complimented her. I know that sounds bitchy, but it's true. Sometimes I'd find myself thinking that she'd get fat again or her boobs would disappear once her pills ran out. 

I'm terrible, I know. 

I made the mistake yesterday of verbally expressing my jealousy towards her out of anger. 

We were shopping at the mall and I tried on a dress I liked. The dress didn't come closed all the way and I became pissed off. My friend offered helpful words, telling me that maybe we could get a bigger size and I lost it. 

It was like I wasn't in control what came out of my mouth and I confessed everything to her. She ran off crying and now she won't answer her phone.

Summarize the given text in a few sentences.
<bot>: Old friend got hot at college while I got not. I became jealous and lashed out at her. I want to say sorry, but she won't answer her phone.