<human>: Give me a shortened version of the text

So last night, I decided to a do little whiskey drinking before going to a concert that was a relatively close bike ride away. Turns out I drank a little too much, and after spending an additional $20 at the venue on more alcohol, I was white boy wasted. 

As my two friends and I were leaving, I drunkenly began trying to unlock my bike (I was going to walk it home, or at least my friends were going to make me walk it home). I began trying to unlock it with my work cabinet key, which in my defense does look similar to the bike key. Somehow in my drunken stupidity, I don't realize this is the wrong key and break it off inside the lock trying to open it. 

My friends, guessing that I broke my bike key and the situation was hopeless, take me home. This morning before work, I walked all the way back to the venue to find it locked up, but missing both tires, the seat rod (with tail light), and the seat. Manage to pull out the broken key piece with a paperclip and unlock the bike, then had to carry it to a bus stop and take it to a bike shop. All in all, the replacement parts cost are looking like they'll cost me more than $300 ($80 for each wheel, $30 for each tire, $40 for seat, $25 for seat rod, and then assembly cost).  

I was too drunk to remember watching the band I actually bought the tickets to see.
<bot>: I got drunk and broke my bike lock and had to leave the bike overnight, resulting in it getting stripped and costing me $300 to replace the parts.