<human>: Can you give me a shortened version of the text?

Hey, y'all, I've been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for about 8 months now. It's my first serious and long term relationship. I've only had one relationship prior, and it was a bit odd. (Started off normal, dissolved after 3 weeks due to emotional difficulties, then turned into a FWB situation)

So my current problem is this: Due to work, money, and school, we can only be together when she has breaks from school, which isn't often. Whenever she comes out, about a week or two before hand, I start to get really excited to see her and love her and be with her. But the day right before and the day of, I suddenly become terrified about our relationship. I suddenly want to go out and be with other girls, go fuck around. And then when she arrives, it's like greeting an old friend and not a lover. Kissing her suddenly becomes awkward. It's so confusing. 

I think I love her, and we seem to be very compatible with each other, but sometimes I feel like I met her too soon in my life. That I haven't grown up enough to truly appreciate the relationship. And yet I know that if I break up with her, I will never see her again.

I'm going to tap some professional help soon, but I'd still like your advice. Thank you all kindly for whatever help you will provide!
<bot>: I'm afraid that I'm putting up walls to stop hurting when she leaves and in the process pushing her out of the relationship