<human>: I've made some other posts, but we dated for 2+ years and broke up Wednesday. 

I still feel pretty dead inside but I'm getting by. I actually already got a new job offer and have been spending lots of time with my family and friends. Sometimes it feels like the relationship never happened, since I'm in a new city and away from him and the city where we were together. There are already times during the day where I don't feel the deep pain, but I feel like the peace is just a lie and that I'm only in denial and I'm only making the future pain worse by not full force fighting the pain right now.  

There have even been a few times where I've woken up feeling nothing, so I've like gone out of my way to make myself sad, just so I can FEEL it and deal with the pain. I can acknowledge that we're no longer together and it was time and now it's time for me to start my new life, and I miss him, but I still feel myself pushing away bad feelings (like whenever I see something that reminds me of him, I try and just temporarily shut down my mind so I don't have to hurt from it).

There's some quote I've read that says "Breaking up is like winning a shitty lottery- you either take the lump sum and deal with it all at once or do a pay out over a long period of time." I'm worried that by not being consumed in my pain now, it's just going to make it even harder in the long run.

Provide a brief overview of the text.
<bot>: I feel like any peace I have after this breakup is just a lie, and that I need to be consumed in this pain to really heal.