<human>: Give me a shortened version of the text

So this fuck up happened around 2 months ago and I just got reminded of it today so I thought I would share it with you all.

Anyways on to the FU. So It was 10 am and I had just finished a shift at work. I was looking to blow off some steam after being abused by customers all day so I texted my brother to see if he wanted to have a blaze. He was keen so I headed over to his apartment. We got the bong ready and headed out onto his balcony to have a session. Here is where FU #1 happened. In our haste to get outside we shut the door to the balcony and it was locked. I of course burst out laughing and it was only increased by the level of rage
Apparent on his face. He literally said "oh god I cannot spend 7 hours with astonrs outside" so we had to come up with a Plan.
First we got nice and blazed and a plan came into our minds. He would just hop off his balcony onto the neighbour's one and go through their sliding door and through there apartment. 
Without another word he was off. He somehow made it across and then realized that their balcony door wasn't open. Fuck
He knew he had to get off this balcony so he did what any sensible stoned person would do. He jumped off the balcony 2 stories up into the car park. 
He broke both is legs and I just had to sit up there watching him laughing my ass off for an hour until someone came.
<bot>: got stoned with the bro. Inside we could no longer go. He went for the jump. And landed on his rump.