<human>: Can you provide a brief rundown of the text in within 3 sentences?

First off, I know it was stupid to get involved with a guy who was seeing someone. They're long distance (6000 miles type distance) and he and I just hit it off and it was very intense. The friendship just spiralled into acting on the attraction. 

I finally called it off after a year of back and forth (maybe a month of dating to three months avoiding each other type thing) - it went from some guilt ridden illicit affair to (for him) just sexual, but the whole time I was madly in love with him. He has always said I'm too young for him, that I've got my whole life ahead and if we were to date I'd get bored of him in a few years. He also said he likes me, but not enough to leave someone he loves. I know I'm stupid and I probably mean absolutely nothing to him but I just... don't know how to start exorcising this ghost. I want to know whether he ever really cared for me, why he cheated if he's so in love, why can't he let me go? Every time we try be friends it falls back into old patterns. I don't know what he wants from me and he can never give me a straight answer. 

What do I do? How do I give up and walk away?
<bot>: can't get over ex despite being side chick, can't accept he doesn't give a crap about me, can't figure it how to move on. Feel weak and pathetic and stupid.