<human>: I've gotten to the point where I've given up. I don't know what to do in this situation because I'm so fed up and upset. Here's a short backstory:

Met this guy wayyyyy long ago, probably almost 10 years ago. Good friends since, always "friends with benefits" kind of thing going on. I would break up with a SO, he'd be there; he'd break up with a SO, I was there. Was very on/off for many years - but NEVER official. 

Last year I had a "last straw" with him. Didn't talk for over a year because of some personal things going on. Of course, after so long of that we started it up this past few weeks. He currently has a SO, but when I met up with him I had no idea (he doesn't have a facebook and I havent talked to him in almost a year). After hooking up, he mentions he wants to be with me and to do anything to make it right. 

This stuck in my mind because it's something I've NEVER heard come from his mouth. So is he telling the truth? I tell him okay what are we waiting for... and I'm then told of the situation. Instantly freak out and basically say "figure your shit out".

It's been two weeks. There is still no word if he's ended things or not. I'm absolutely torn because not only is him saying those things everything I've ever wanted, but because I know he's not anything I deserve. I don't know what to do in this situation. How do you deal with someone who you've loved since you've met and who you've thought would be yours forever? I am torn between what I've always wanted and what I deserve.

Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?
<bot>: Long term on/off/never-actually-SO confesses he wants to make it real. Won't break it off with current fling so stuck between what I know I've always wanted and what I actually deserve...