<human>: Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?

Yes, this actually happened today.

On the way home from the groomer, with my bigass, loudass, meanass dog in the back, I hit a small snowstorm. No big deal, I can drive in this. 

Until I hit a patch of black ice, and couldn't. My car started to slide, directly towards the stopped pickup in front of me. Brakes were useless. E-brake was useless. I put the car into a slow spin to eat up some forward momentum, and after what seemed like a terrifying eternity, stopped with a sickening crunch, 90 degrees to the traffic flow with cars skidding by all around me. 

Thankfully, I was OK and my car was drivable - I'd hit the truck's tow hitch with my rear bumper. But the driver motioned for me to pull into the police station parking lot across the street. Fuck, I've never had a ticket, not even a parking ticket. God, God damnit.

In the lot, I got out of my car as the other driver approached me. My junkyard-personal-protection-mutt-militia goes *apeshit*, as the driver says something over the ruckus about 'getting one of his lieutenants out to take a look...paperwork....insurance "...
I hadn't hit *a* cop, I'd hit *the* city's police commander. FML.

Turns out he's a pretty nice guy, and he even joked that he *almost* made it to retirement without an accident. Sorry, man :/ Because the damage was less than $1000 (zero damage to his truck, thankfully, and just some paint missing from my bumper), nothing was filed and I was on my way. Though his lieutenant did say my dog was a hell of a body guard...
<bot>: got into my first fender bender, with the city's police commander. He's a nice guy and my dog is hellspawn.