<human>: Could you distill the essence of the text into 1-3 sentences?

Ok this happened about twenty minutes ago. 

So tonight was my first time back at the gym in a couple months. I used to go pretty frequently but as of lately have been far too busy with work. 

As I'm leaving I'm feeling pretty damn good and pleased that I actually pushed my self to go. I've got some new tunes blasting as I walk towards the elevator when all of a sudden I get a text from my best friend who just returned from a 6 month trip. 

While staring at my phone I enter the elevator, press P1 and begin pacing around. I finished the message and was just about to hit send when all of a sudden white goo squirts all over the screen of my phone and right into the front speaker. Shit scared and utterly shocked I look up only to realize that while pacing around aimlessly I had walked right into the automatic hand sanitizer dispenser...
<bot>: feeling jolly, wasn't paying attention and accidentally subjected my phone to a non-consensual hygiene bukakke.