<human>: I know i just posted something an hour ago, but I changed my perspective on the whole thing. Maybe a new flair or whatever it's called. (sorry new)

Background:
Dated 11 months, complications outside lead to the split, best friends for quite awhile before, completely dedicated until the complications did not get any better after around 9 months of suffering. Still love each other (at least what he says), almost begged to not hate him and to wait for us to be us again. Around a month in I blew up on him,  I was overdramatic, I was not coping with the breakup well. Im afraid I drove him off. I dont think he even cares. I decided to take a contact break, and here we are.

I dont want to talk to him for at least a month, but I cant help thinking of how childish I was. Do I say "Im not ready to talk, but I cant believe I was so childish I was and I need to apologize, I hope I didnt ruin everything." After only a week of no contact? Or wait it out? 

I just want my bestfriend back, but I think he's doing fine without me. And I really think it's because of how I acted. I feel like such a b word, it wasn't the real me and I want him to know that. I just dont want to create anymore unnecessary drama, I dont want to make it ANY worse (from a to be continued relationship to tension and no communication), but its bugging me. I dont believe in "If its meant to be it will be," sometimes you have to take action! I dont know. Speak now or wait?

Can you provide a brief overview of the text?
<bot>: Is an apology desperate to someone who doesn't seem to care? Do I play it cool or risk losing him in my life? (As a bestfriend.. mostly)