<human>: Give me a shortened version of the text

Hi r/relationships. I normally give advice here under a different nom de guerre, but this time I'm looking for your perspectives.

A summary of my romantic life for context: I spent the past year single, but before that I was in two long-term relationships almost continuously since I was in my mid-teens. I dated my first GF for several years simply because she was the first woman who ever showed attraction to me, but I dated my second for several more years because we were a much better fit and I actually loved her back. The second one lasted 4.5 years, and if I had to describe it succinctly, I'd say it was the period in my life that radiated a warm glow, full of vivid colors and a sense of infinite potential. Well...in the first couple of years when things were going well, anyway. During the entirety of my first and during the final year of my second relationship, I've been on the receiving end of every dysfunctional-relationship issue that routinely gets posted to r/relationships.

Since I became single, I've tried various avenues of dating, and even though I've met many new women who are amazing in their own right, I always feel myself "closing" when the sparks start flying. The reactions are purely involuntary - instead of feeling excited about sharing personal details with a new person, I'd feel dread about what will happen when the honeymoon period ends. Or what will happen when distance or another person intrudes on the relationship. **Basically, dreading the storm clouds in the distance that will eventually but inevitably move overhead. It's preventing me from enjoying the sunshine and butterflies at the beginning of every relationship.**

It's perfectly reasonable that I'm taking the lessons from my previously-failed relationships to heart, but I'm worried that cynicism and over-caution will drain the passion out of any new relationship that I pursue.

r/relationships, what are your thoughts and experiences on this?
<bot>: Fell recklessly in love. Incredible experience. Ended badly. Looking forward, but can't turn off pessimism. Share your experience and I'll give you a cookie.