<human>: Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?

The points: 

* I work in IT and am a pretty solitary guy, having her in my life makes me so much more at ease.  I have general anxiety so this is important.  

* I've never really felt "love" from anyone but her, I had a messed up childhood so having someone this close to me is new and exciting

* My college days were really intense, I'm yearning for the excitement of being single again but don't want to hurt SO, constantly thinking about peers my age, not sexually attracted to SO anymore

* She's from another country on a student visa, been living with me for 8 months.  she moved in because she was living with 6 other girls in a 2br place, all worked at the same whip-wielding restaurant to pay for school

* Obviously hurting someone sucks and the feeling of being alone is terrifying (new city, no close friends)... but I do feel trapped, like I could be growing a lot more.  Was formerly polyamorous, jumped into this on impulse.  

* I told her I never intend on getting married or having kids.  She accepted that, we've been monogamous for 18 months 

* she doesn't know many other people so I offer some level of security, but taking that away by breaking up would ruin a big part of her life, she might go back home
<bot>: feeling trapped/antsy with live-in SO, I want to go out and mingle and make mistakes and experiment, but I don't want to ruin this girl's life