<human>: Yesterday I had a coupon code for a free pizza, so I went to get one for my boyfriend and I to share. I had biked to this pizza place and it was only about a block away from my boyfriend's flat, so once the pie was ready I decided to bike rather than walk back so it wouldn't get cold. I carefully balanced the box on my handlebars and held it with one hand and steered and braked with the other.
Again, it was only one block, and I thought I could make it. I thought wrong.
A few seconds after going down the smallest of curbs, my legs start to feel hot. I look down and the pizza is flying out of the box all over me, my bike, and the sidewalk. I slam the brakes and start assessing the damage. No slices were spared - the entire medium pizza is on my lap and the ground so I pick up the hot pineappley carnage and toss it. I debate going back and getting another one, but a combination of the embarrassment I would feel going back to the pizza place covered in cheese and grease to get another pizza and the stinging feeling on my legs prompt me to just go to my boyfriend's empty-handed. 
When I got there, after I explained what happened in tears, my boyfriend helped me peel off my tights to reveal a first degree burn on one thigh and three second degree burns on the other thigh and ankle from the molten cheese. I've never been cheated on before, but this is how I imagine it must feel. Hurt and betrayed by the one you love. 
After calming me down and treating my burns, my boyfriend left to go buy us a new pizza (on foot) and on the way texted me to let me know he saw some birds enjoying a slice of ground pizza I forgot to toss, so I guess it wasn't a total waste.

Give me the gist of the text in a nutshell
<bot>: Got a free pizza, tried to bike with it. Ended up spilling all over me, giving me multiple second-degree burns.