<human>: Could you distill the essence of the text into 1-3 sentences?

I have chosen not to tell my s.o of a year and a half because the cheating was mostly an emotional affair with a couple physical encounters, and my bf and I have worked through a lot of our communication and intimacy issues and I've been working on myself so that I don't go seeking validation from another man. I truly regret it and want a future with my boyfriend and i know I didn't feel understood by him or connected for some months due to his lack of expressiveness and therefore fell for someone with whom I could connect emotionally with. 

 . Now that the affair is over and I've continued to work on myself and hes worked on being more affectionate with me, I still haven't told him what i did because I cannot bring myself to break his heart, and i know that he would leave me because I did have sex with the other man. And i feel that it would be selfish to relieve my guilt by telling him because then it just damages him and his ability to trust.

So for those who have kept it inside, will it always eat at me this much? I feel the guilt heavily still and often feel unworthy of my boyfriend's love and feel like there's a wall between us now. Is there a way to feel emotionally intimate with him again while still keeping this secret, or is this something time can't heal on its own? I hate feeling like a fake but hurting him sounds so much worse.
<bot>: cheated on boyfriend I want a future with but didn't tell him. Wondering if the guilt will ever ease up or if I'll be able to feel close to him again if I keep it inside forever.