<human>: Give me the gist of the text in a nutshell

Hi community,

It's really screwing with me right now. I've had some little dates int he past months but they all failed. I was too nervous. I normally got an unexpected "yes" for the invitation and then looked forward to it, but then the "Oh shit, you have to make it happen this time!" sinks in and screws with my head big time. How can I meet her expectations and make her not reject me? I also have problems asking a girl out because I feel she might reject me but wouldn't have done so if I had picked the perfect opportunity/ the exact perfect right wording /... .

Funnily, while actually on the date it isn't that bad. The initial nervousness cools down after I've become comfortable and conversation goes well and everything. But I always fail to make anything happen physically and that's what makes me think I'm a worthless failure and it's all my fault... What if it could have worked out just fine but because I didn't behave perfectly, I blocked a chance to finally be happy? Just because I was too stupid to do something right?

When I tell my friends how it went, they're all like "Well, doesn't sound like you fucked up or anything, maybe she wasn't into you that much, but it doesn't sound like you failed" but I can identify at least x opportunities in my head where I think "You could have said something much smoother" or "You could have SO gotten her if you hadn't acted so stupid". Funnily, these thoughts aren't there during the actual date because I don't really think about what I'm doing and just act naturally, all that desperation seems to temporarily fade, but afterwards I tend to beat myself up.

I still feel worthless. Still single. How can I make sure it works the next time? Can I even do that? I mean, if it doesn't work out, it must be my fault because I behaved wrong, how can I guarantee it? I don't want to be alone any longer, I want someone who loves me. I want to know I'm worthy of love so I can finally really indulge in all of my not-so-attractive, nerdy hobbies without shame or inferiority.
<bot>: I tend to get nervous before dates and scared of rejection, and I beat myself up really bad afterwards if I feel I missed a chance to finally be perfectly happy. What can I do to make these feelings stop?