<human>: Can you condense the text into a few key points?

Too lazy to make an alt account.

I keep doing this bullshit attention thing where I complain about myself in an "oh woe is me" way. I know for a fact it's upsetting, and I don't even consciously realize I'm doing it until someone points it out. Every time I think I'm doing better at not doing it, I just do it again, and it's getting to a point where it's making me seriously consider hurting myself because I'm so angry and fed up with being shitty. It's like there's no way I can improve because I'm constantly just going to backslide anyway. Like I'm so fucking awful that I can't even fix one thing about myself. And it's going to be entirely my fault when people start walking away, too, because I'll completely deserve it.
<bot>: I throw pity parties that make people upset, and now I want to hurt myself because I'm not improving how I'd like.