<human>: i want out but don't know how to leave. he lived as a gay man from 18 to 32. then he married, then divorced, and we've been together for 4 years, married for 1. i was against the marriage and realize it was a mistake. he's very wonderful but has so much built up anger. he's cross unless he's high (pot). i don't know how i can leave him, as he is my very best friend... he refuses to go to therapy, individual or couple. I see a therapist. i know he doesn't see it this way, but we are both extremely unhappy the way things are. i know we'll spend the rest of our lives this way unless i choose to change things. it makes me want to cheat on him, but i don't think i could live with myself.

Can you succinctly summarize the text in 1-3 sentences?
<bot>: we're miserable together but he won't do anything about it. i'm struggling to know what's the right move.