<human>: I am getting paid 35k no health insurance or 401k for what typically should be a 50k salary position with benefits (by average market statistics) 

I know the job market is hard and a lot of people would also be excited to be doing this work, however the glimmering startup excitement has worn off and I'm brought back down to earth with real world responsibilities. 

My wife and I are a young married couple both in our late 20's she does not work which makes it particularly hard to support a livable lifestyle for 2 in an expensive urban area with a high demand real estate market. (I would like to leave out the exact details of where we live, but it is within the top 10 most expensive places in the US) 

So I'm stuck in this situation whether to talk to my boss and tell him that I'm looking for work if they can't pay for a livable salary or silently look for a job without asking for a raise and avoid an awkward talk that may potentially change our working relationship forever. Taking also into account that my boss might give a less than stellar recommendation out of spite (that is his personality)

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: I am the largest contributor in the office, but not compensated as such. I work in a pretty in-demand tech position which pays 20k less than the market average for the same position/responsibilities.