<human>: Okay, let me start out by saying in no way is this his fault. Since we met, he has always been clear about not wanting kids. I have an 11 year old from a previous marriage, so figured I would be okay with that (we have been together over 2 years). I was starting to become a little less sure, but knew more than anything I wanted him to be my husband. Here we are, just married, and I have fallen even more in love with him. 

When we are together it almost hurts because I just want to melt in to him and want to find a way to be closer. I don't want any now, I am very busy, but we had to have the talk because we wanted to discuss what would happen if the birth control failed. I just couldn't hurt something that was part of him and I needed him to know that. I have found out, I do want a child with him. I can't get around it. I guess its female hormones or something, but I want to raise a family with him. He considers dogs close enough to kids but wants his freedom. 

I am so broken hearted (again, he was abundantly clear before the marriage), I can't look at him, I can't touch him, or kiss him without just breaking down into tears. I will not have him just "give me a baby". If he doesn't want it, I don't. I don't think its fair at all of me. I know him seeing me so upset it is hurting him. I am not trying to pull a "bait and switch", I just really didn't know. How do I make this okay with myself?

Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?
<bot>: I knew husband didn't want a baby, I didn't either, but now I do and am broken hearted.