<human>: Too lazy to make an alt account.

I keep doing this bullshit attention thing where I complain about myself in an "oh woe is me" way. I know for a fact it's upsetting, and I don't even consciously realize I'm doing it until someone points it out. Every time I think I'm doing better at not doing it, I just do it again, and it's getting to a point where it's making me seriously consider hurting myself because I'm so angry and fed up with being shitty. It's like there's no way I can improve because I'm constantly just going to backslide anyway. Like I'm so fucking awful that I can't even fix one thing about myself. And it's going to be entirely my fault when people start walking away, too, because I'll completely deserve it.

Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?
<bot>: I throw pity parties that make people upset, and now I want to hurt myself because I'm not improving how I'd like.