<human>: Can you give me a shortened version of the text?

I haven't posted in a while because I've been feeling pretty good about everything. These past couple days though have me feeling like it is "day one" of the break up. 

The basic back story is in October my fiancee(22f) left me(27m) for another guy, who she cheated on me with for several months. We were together for 4 years and engaged for 3 of them. 

I have been getting by pretty well overall. I dated a couple women, started my podcast back up (ex hated it) and spent more time with friends. The thing I can't get over is the emptiness I feel especially when I'm with other women. They just don't excite me like my ex did and I can't help but feel like I lost the one I was really meant to be with. I know that's ridiculous, but I just can't shake it from my brain. This has caused me feel that crushing loneliness again these past couple days. 

I'm trying hard to push her out of my head and heart, but it's hard when we still work together. She recently broke NC when she had to ask me about our old car insurance. I had a fairly pleasant conversation with her and found out how awful things are going for her, but she maintains that she is happy. I of course told her how "great" everything is going for me. Which is the half truth, sometimes I feel great, other times I feel like ripping my heart  out of my chest. 

I feel really stupid over letting her talk to me and "playing nice". She admitted to me that she was afraid to talk to me and I honestly liked that. Now since we've talked she thinks it's open season on interacting with me. I can't stand it, I prefer the out of site out of mind method. 

I can't help but feel like I will never find someone that I will want to be around as much as I did her. This has me seriously concerned. I talk to women all the time, but all I still care about is her. It's like I have some sort of mental block that won't let me move on. It's really starting to get to me. I just don't know what to do right now...
<bot>: Fiancee of 4 years broke up with me in October, I can't get over her and she broke NC recently.