<human>: My wife [30/f] and I [36/m] were never super big on kids. She doesn't have a lot of motherly instincts (perhaps from having a cold, narcissistic mom), doesn't coo over babies, isn't thrilled about being pregnant etc. I've never been aiming for a big family, but I liked the thought of having at least one child. 

We've been together 7 years, married for 3. All along, she said she'd be "okay" with having a child if circumstances were right. I never pushed her hard for the reasons I mentioned above, and I liked our life together. Kids were simply never a big part of our grand plan. But I really valued that we had a choice; that we could make a decision between the two of us on whether or not we wanted a child.

Recently, we learned my wife has a medical condition that will require removal of at least one ovary, and very possibly both depending on further diagnosis. She, for obvious reasons, doesn't feel this is that bad a thing.

I'm freaking out a bit. I know she could technically get pregnant even without her ovaries, but the things we would need to go through (egg donation, IVF, multiple possible tries, etc.) would raise the financial and emotional costs so much that I am 100% certain we'd never have kids. You surely can't go through all of that on the strength of one partner wanting kids alone.

How do I deal with the likely loss of the choice to have kids? With there being no "easy" way to have a child should we want it? How do I talk to her without making it seem like I'm being selfish?

Could you distill the essence of the text into 1-3 sentences?
<bot>: no intense preferences for or against kids; liked having a choice; medical condition makes it likely we never have any. What to do?