<human>: Can you condense the text into a few key points?

Today, I messed up. 

I work in an office building. It's a pretty neat place, and I work with some of the most amazing people. The office is nicely decorated, has a few fun distractions around the office; free food, foosball, table tennis. We are all a really close knit bunch, despite working with 200 other people. 

One of my favourite things about this office though, is the peace and sanctuary one is afforded in the bathrooms. *[Editors note; this story takes place in a bathroom, but isn't focused on defecating]*

My favourite bathroom; the unisex stall on floor one. It's got dim lighting - great place for a moment of contemplation - and the Wifi reception is great. 

I share something with John Dorian here, in that I'm most comfortable when naked. I take a moment to carefully de-robe, as I take my rightful place on the throne. I take a second to select my reading entertainment from the day (tales from /r/pettyrevenge - I think), and proceed.

Now, it's hard to tell if the loos in our office are locked from a first glance - most of the time the doors get a good shake by a would-be-customer. After a fair few shakes and frights over the years, I habitually check the door, imagining my potential embarrassment.

Just as I'm running through this scenario in my head to day, the door busts open. I lock eyes with the new Front Desk girl, three days into the job. 

There I am, in my knee-leaning back-hunched naked state. All I can do is muster a feeble... "sorry...?" as she backs off. I hide in the dimly lit room of shame for as long as it took for the colour to leave my cheeks. 

Not surprisingly, didn't have much conversation as I strolled past her desk on the way home.
<bot>: You're right, my friend, man is the only animal that wears pants during twosies.* Perhaps for good reason.