<human>: My husband and I have been together for 9 years, married 2 years. Recently, he has begun expressing some frustration and disappointment with my poor performance in social situations. 

The event that brought this to focus was this past Thanksgiving weekend. We had friends of ours (~30M, ~30F) come to spend Thanksgiving and the long weekend with us, and also visited some friends of theirs in the area. I tried to be a good sport about it, but I am not a very social person. When I feel overwhelmed, I cope by hanging back from the group and being formally polite, while inside I usually just want to cry and leave. My husband brought this to my attention, and told me he would like me to be more personable, as it's giving the impression that I dislike the people I'm around.

Some background on me, I strongly suspect that I may have Aspergers or a similar issue. I have never had friends, have great difficulty with grooming and dressing tastefully (I have good hygiene, shower daily, wear deodorant and clean clothes, etc), and realize that I can be very awkward in conversation. I am thankfully self aware enough to know that I am very awkward, so I cope by just avoiding situations where I know I will fall short. None of this was hidden from my husband, and he has seen my clumsy attempts at socializing throughout our relationship. 

I am trying my best, making myself go out routinely to the gym, running errands, activities with our son [1M], but he is always pushing me for more. He is irritated that I have no friends, and is expecting me to come to his office holiday party, which terrifies me. I would be happiest if I could go through life getting my things done in complete invisibility, but that is impossible. 

How can I make myself be more socially appropriate, and/or convince my husband that I cannot be what he expects?

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: I am frumpy and socially awkward, and it is bothering my husband. How can I improve myself or communicate this to him to modify his expectations?