<human>: I'm not even sure where to start. My girlfriend and I have been together for over ten years but I've been having problems with myself. I've felt this way before about four years ago and now it's back. 

I feel like I can't breathe. I've felt very held back for the passed ten years. I don't think I really know myself or what I want at all. I jumped into a long distance relationship at seventeen and I feel like missed out on a lot for myself. I want adventure and I wanna feel young but she's not into being that way at all. I find myself thinking about dating and being with other imaginary women.

Our sex life is dead. I'm not always attracted to her. I've realized this has always been the case but that's because she's always been very overweight. It also contributes to the way she dresses, matronly, usually. She's always saying she wants to change and I've honestly been waiting because I feel like we would be able to do more if she did. I'm waiting because I do still love her but it's been ten years. I feel like I'm wasting my life. 
She's always asking why I don't want to have sex by going through different reasons. She finally asked if it was because of her weight. I thought for literally two seconds to confess until she said "if it is then you're an asshole." 

She's not an awful person. I've loved her this long and have never had issues which is why I'm concerned. I'm starting to feel like I might be depressed and that could be a contributing factor. I've been through a lot in a year, I don't think I wanna go through it but there has been death, career problems and school problems. Maybe I'm just so deep I'm nitpicking. 

I really wanna save this relationship and I really want to stop having such a heavy feeling in my chest.

Can you condense the text into three sentences or less?
<bot>: Im trying to save my relationship even while being unattracted to my gf but I could be overthinking due to possible depression.