<human>: So, here's the thing.  
I'm an incredibly shy guy when it comes to girls and relationships. I can talk to them normally, be friends with them, but I've never had enough courage to engage in something like a relationship, it really baffled people how I still don't have a girlfriend, but that's how it is, and that's what led to me being a virgin at the age of 23.  
But eventually I met my current girlfriend who had enough courage to initiate things between us and who I actually liked, and we started a relationship. We really like each other and I can really to talk to her about anything, we're really honest to each other and we immediately talk about things that bother us.  
The virgin thing came along and she told me she had no problem whatsoever with me being one, she told me she'll wait until I'm ready, she's pretty cool.  
  
But here's what's bothering me and what I don't want to tell her because I don't want to hurt her since I know I'm wrong about this.  
It's simple, I would prefer the situation where we both were virgins. I guess it's a stupid macho thing where I would like to be the one who she loses it with and I'm affraid that after I lose it to her I will feel down and unhappy about that fact that she was my first and I wasn't hers.  
  
Please tell me how do I escape from this mindset, I'm really affraid this could ruin our relationship..

Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?
<bot>: I don't know how to get over the fact that I'm still a virgin and my girlfriend not being one, I know I'm in the wrong about this.