<human>: To pre face this, I had known that he had been unfaithful to his wife before and it is something of a running joke in our circle that he flirts with anything that walks.

Things started in August. It progressed from me being active about her knowing that all we were doing was hanging out and drinking. She said it was cool, and that he needed other friends. But one night, under the influence of a bottle of vodka, we kissed. Ill spare the details but things obviously progressed from there to us having sex. At the end of September I moved 2 hours away for school and he would drive up once a week to see me. 

The wife had no knowledge of us hanging out, outside of the summer. 
I have been trying to think of why the fuck I would have ever let this happened. I started to realize, that I was incredibly lonely. I had made any excuse for this behavior because I felt so unloved by the last 3 guys I had tried to make things work with. Maybe I even thought that since he had done this before it was okay. But it wasn't. The only time I didn't feel awful about it was when we saw each other.

I don't have any feelings towards him now, and when I told him we were done it was like a huge weight off my chest. 

The obvious issue now is that I will still see him and his wife, and I do really care about her. No one has any idea about the affair, and I can't tell anyone about it. I have to keep it from my best friends and his wife and I hate every second of it. I can't figure out what my next move is. I know I made a horrible mistake, and I wish I could take it back but I can't. Can someone please help me figure out how to forgive myself, or how to move on from this? I am so afraid that I won't ever find love now because of this..that I am damaged goods because I accepted this relationship and didn't say no.

Summarize the given text in a few sentences.
<bot>: Had an affair with a married guy in my friends group. Broke things off, and now I'm trying to deal with the guilt.