<human>: Hey all. Thank you for your time up front. 

So I (M/22) know this girl (F/21) and we've been friends for a long time. We met at freshmen orientation and have been friends ever since. I always found her cute but one of us was always dating someone else so we never gave it much thought. 

So 2 months ago, she broke up with her boyfriend of a year, and we had a night together. Well one night, turned into multiple and we started hanging out more and got very close. I expressed to her that I wanted to make this a real thing, but she told me she wasn't ready. She wanted the same, but just couldn't have a boyfriend right now. 

Meanwhile, she's still texting an her ex. An an ex from a couple years ago, has appeared and they're hanging out together. She told me she was venting to him the other night about something she was pissed about. Am I wrong for thinking "Well why didn't I know about this?" 

She swears up and down she wants to be with me. To be perfectly honest (and I know others feel this way) but I am a very closed off person. Very social, just don't let people in my life this way. 

Am I just the back-up? I care about her and how she feels, but she knows how I feel too, and I feel like I'm the third option behind some fucking ex boyfriends.

Can you provide a brief rundown of the text in within 3 sentences?
<bot>: Feeling like I am the third option to a girl who swears I'm all shes looking for but isn't ready to date.