<human>: Give me the gist of the text in a nutshell

Today I hung out with some friends, one of which was a newly acquainted (fairly attractive) fellow. The others were two good friends and a best friend. Everything was cool, we were having fun. Me being the socially awkward of the group, sat and played video games rather than talk and be a normal human.

All was well and good... then it hit me, the two large cups of Bojangles sweet tea that is. And of course, being the classiest of ladies, I got up to take a massive shit. Went and found the bathroom and got down to business. Turns out, it was more massive than I thought. My thoughts? "Shit, that's a lot of shit". Disregarding the copious amount of fecal matter, I flushed anyway. Worst decision i have made in my life. And unsurprisingly, I clogged that bitch. Frantically searching for a plunger and to no avail did I find one. Not wanting to tell my friends what I had done and having them ridicule me, I improvised. The next best thing I could find was an empty toilet paper roll. Next thing I new was that I was wrist deep in my own waste, hurriedly digging with my new found tool. 

Good news? Got the toilet unclogged without anyone knowing what happened. Bad news? My hand to my forearm was coated in feces and urine.
<bot>: I clogged a guys toilet, and rather than embarrassing myself and asking for a plunger, i took matters into my own hands... literally.