<human>: Can you succinctly summarize the text in 1-3 sentences?

Any insight anybody could give me would be amazing. 

my SO [31/m] and myself [28/f] have been together 3 years, and living together almost as long. our relationship has been amazing for the most part. but my partner has ADHD and it's effecting us both negatively, and i'm about to snap.

my normally, mild mannered, stoner boyfriend can turn at the drop of a hat into this raging beast. he is never violent, but things he says can be verbally abusive. if we're having a disagreement, he'll often blurt out: "shut the fuck up" and "stop acting so fucking stupid" only to be guilt ridden later on, and apologize. this is the ADHD, and i know when he gets frustrated he says things without thinking (a common symptom of ADHD), but it can still be hurtful. I know it's the mental disorder talking, because he is such a loving partner, otherwise. 

he has told me to leave him because he doesn't like seeing me hurt, but i honestly love this man to pieces (and would marry him if either of us believed in marriage). he says he's tried and can't control his brain, but is willing to speak with someone again about his condition. he's been on medication before, but it made him into a zombie, and has found self medicating with occasional marijuana use more tolerable. 

have you experienced life with a partner with ADHD? How did you deal with it? Did they/ or had they gotten any help?
<bot>: partner has adhd and even though we are hopeful for change, my outlook is becoming less optimistic with every outburst he has.