<human>: So I really don't know why I'm not torally broken about all this. He left me because he said he was bored and apathetic. Normally I'd find some way to blame myself: "If ony I had been more loving. if only I had been more attentive and spontaneous. If only i had been more fun like he said"

But this time I'm not.

About a month ago over Feburary break when he broke up with me for my forgetting my promise to talk to my borderline-abusive ex. I was completely destroyed. I felt awful for betraying him. He'd told me he'd never yell at me because he knows how much I was around yelling when I was little and how much it impacted me. But he was more livid than I've ever seen him.

I was so depressed about it. I slept in until 4 pm, i hardly ate the entire week, I only left the house once to sob my entire session with my therapist. I was depressed until he came to forgive me and we got back together

This time, i'm not blaming myself, I've cried two days after he broke up with me and hardly since then, and I've been cheery like nothing's happened.

The only part about this break up I feel kind of shitty about is the fact that I'm trying to hook up with my friend. I feel bad for wanting it so soon after a break up, but at the same time I want to be validated, to feel loved and desired, to feel like I matter to someone.

I'm confused as to why I'm feeling pretty good, considering I was dumped a week ago. I feel I should be far more depressed than my current mood.

Give me a shortened version of the text
<bot>: bf broke up with me a week ago, and I'm not super depressed about it. Also i feel like a bad person trying to hook up with my friend