<human>: I've recently confessed my feelings towards a friend whom I liked for 4 years. He kindly rejected me and we're still good friends. He's one of my closest friends but because I still love him, I feel extremely depressed at the fact that I'll get nothing more than just a friendship. Because I've liked him for so long, I feel like something within me died. My friends tell me that I've changed, and that I have a "dark aura". I feel the need to be with another person to make up for all those years of emotions I've spent on him. But when the opportunity arises, I become numb and reject everything and everyone. 

I don't know if I can handle being his friend anymore. I don't want to lose him but at the same time, I can't bear hearing the news of him one day finding someone else and so forth. I can't bear not talking to him because he's the only person who can sincerely make me smile and laugh. He's caused so many tears and laughters over the years and I don't know if I can do it anymore.

Condense the text into a few key points
<bot>: in love with a friend, told him, got rejected, still friends, but it  hurts to stay as friends.