<human>: First off, a bit about my sexuality. If asked to sum up what I'm looking for in a single word I would say Femdom, a BDSM relationship where the female is the dominant one. This is something I discovered about myself early in high school and have been exploring it sense then. I have had a single relationship where I felt I was comfortable enough to start exploring some aspects of this style of sexuality, but that was after almost two years of being together. Since that relationship I have been with a couple other women, none of which have involved any kinkiness in the bedroom. In the most recent relationship, I ended up losing a lot of interest in "traditional" sex, as that is just not what I tend to fantasize about these days. Eventually she tired in my lower desire for vanilla sex, but I didn't feel comfortable enough in our relationship to open up to her about my kinks out of fear of rejection, disgust, etc. I know many women would turn running if I asked them to tie me down and spank me (among the tamer of my fantasies) so I don't want to risk ruining an otherwise enjoyable relationship just to fulfill my sexual desires. But at this point I feel I am so engrained in my kinky ways, it would be hard to go back. Also, why should I have to? I don't feel that I chose my sexuality any more than a gay or straight person, this is just what I feel attracted too and that's about the best I can explain it. 

So Reddit, I ask you, do I ignore my kinks and just try to focus on enjoying the vanilla sex?
Or do I start opening up to the women I date about my kinkiness sooner in the relationship? If so, how would I go about doing that?

Could you distill the essence of the text into 1-3 sentences?
<bot>: I'm kinky, I'm not incredibly interested in "standard" sex but I still want to be intimate with women and have meaningful relationships. Do I tell them or do I suck it up and try to cope?