<human>: So I grew up on a farm and am now living in an unbelievably urban area. By nature, I expect courtesy and respect from my neighbors, and seldomly do I receive it. I may or may not have become slightly alcoholic since moving to the city, so that factors into the current predicament. I have been a little toasted on rum for the past couple days, and /r/funny and netflix have been the main source of entertainment for my weekend, so I've been unobnoxiously keeping to myself. So living in what I feel is fair to call "the hood," I am aware  of "hood-like" shenanigans since apartment is in the middle of the main hallway, and I am subjected to quarrels of all imaginable varieties. 

As I said, I haven't really been in my right mind the last couple days. I've been sitting here listening to music and browsing reddit like a noob, and I hear a bunch of "commotion" outside. I pay no attention and continue swigging/redditing, because that's what people do. The commotion continues for what seems like an hour. I finally decide I've had enough, and I get off my bed to make a 6 foot trip to the door when my inebriated feet forget how to operate, and I bash my face into the peephole long enough to get a glimpse of the landlord right outside.

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: Was drunk, tripped while trying to see what was happening outside my door, scared the shit out of my landlord who was making friendly banter with fellow residents outside, and think I knocked myself out for a tick.