<human>: Can you condense the text into three sentences or less?

So, waiting on a light to turn green, I drive a 4 speed manual, put my car in first gear and slowly let off the clutch to move forward and immediately got lit up. Cop thought I was trying to reverse into his car. 

Turns out, my reverse lights come on when I'm in first. Got a $10 fix it ticket for "reverse lights in gear" 

So, that was my fuck up. I actually have another car related fuck up from about 2 years ago. It was actually the SAME COP that pulled me over today. 

I was driving an old red Buick Lesabre, 1991 model. This car never did run right for me, even after changing plugs, air flow sensor, oxygen sensor, coil packs, et al. 

Anyway I'm coming off a stoplight and the good old un-muffled V6 decides that it was going to hesitate hardcore. I had a cop behind me, about 3 feet from my bumper. He starts creeping up on me, so I FLOOR it. 

Car backfires through the exhaust and takes off like a bullet, trailing flames across the intersection. I heard the sirens and pulled over. Cop asks me to get out of the car, and look at his bumper. My exhaust backfire had melted a good sized hole in his front bumper. 

I did not get a ticket for this, because after he had his supervisor come out, he admitted he was riding me too close and told me "you might want to get that fixed" I left and other than a hilarious story to tell I was not scarred by this. That car later went on to grenade it's transmission pulling into the trailer park I live in.
<bot>: TIFU by reversing my car into a cop and melting his bumper. 2 run-ins with the same cop.