<human>: Give me a shortened version of the text

My ex and I were long-distance, and due to the nature of our work, we were going to be long distance for another 2 years. I broke it off because I wasn't sure if I wanted to do 2 years of long distance, followed by major life decisions re: career/life/kids in order to be together for the long haul. We were together for 5 years before that. It was really tough. I broke up with her over the phone, and she told me she never wanted to talk to me again. Then, 9 months of radio silence on both ends. I figured this was a good thing, since it would enable us to both get on with our lives. But now, I feel like it's maybe doing more harm than good. I don't like the feeling that there is someone out there who I value/respect who hates my guts. I feel like after this amount of time, maybe it wouldn't be so bad to reach out to her. But maybe she legit never wants to talk to me again. I think that the reasons I broke up with her are still there, so I don't really envision getting back together. But at the same time, it would make me feel a lot better to have some sort of civil interaction with her, rather than just pretending she never existed. I feel the need to "clear the air" with her, since this is bothering me quite a lot. But maybe this is just a selfish reaction, and I should leave her alone forever? Thoughts?
<bot>: I ended a long distance relationship 9 months ago. No contact. Feel bad. Want to contact her to clear the air. Bad or good idea?