<human>: After a physical assault, our three year relationship ended. He was always verbally and mentally abusive, the height of the physical abuse was shoving me and pushing me about, however in turn I also became abusive towards him. There is no doubt about it, we behaved like animals to each other and would always ask why we would do it, because when it was good it was amazing.

I got a restraining order against him given how serious the assault was, but also because I knew we had to break the cycle. I had no contact with him since the night it ended but then he messaged me the other day asking if we should talk to close the book.

We both admitted we still love and miss each other, and both apologized for everything.  He told me he wants me to be happy and to move on. But I seem to be becoming more heartbroken everyday.

 I felt and still do feel a strong connection to him that I have never felt with anyone else. I'm not happy, I've tried meeting other people I've been on dates and I just can't help my feelings for my ex. 

Why if two people are still in love with each other should they be apart? Last year he promised me he would go into counselling for his issues, and I was prepared to go with him if he needed me, to make it work. I would have done anything. 

Talking to him has just made me miss him even more, maybe it wasn't a good idea. Maybe I'm naive. I don't know but I need helping understanding that if we love each other why shouldn't we be together.

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: was in a two way abusive relationship, spoke to ex for first time in four months and we both admitted to still loving and missing each other