<human>: I'll keep this short. Wife and I got married 6 months ago but have been living together for 3 years, dated for 4. My SO doesn't clean up the majority of her stuff.  She does laundry and [barely] cleans the kitchen, but that's not what bothers me.  the stuff that gets to me are things like how she has left the ladder ball outside in the middle of the yard for 9 months straight.  I've asked her to put it away about 30 times.  She has crap all over the garage floor from when she "cleans" out her car.  When she puts things in the pantry, she doesn't put them where they go, she just shoves stuff in there haphazardly.  She has a desk in my office and her lack of organization has taken over the whole room so much so that I don't want to go in there.

"Just talk to her, marriage is all about communication".

We have had many talks, but it always ends up with her getting irrationally upset with me.  When this talk happens, she blames me as the one who doesn't clean, even though I cite all the messes around the house that are her personal things.  We are at a point where I don't bring it up anymore, I just ignore her piles of crap laying around even though it really bothers me.

What can I do?  I feel like throwing away some of her stuff that hasn't been cleaned up in over a year, like all the crap on the garage floor, but that will probably make her rage.

How can I get her to understand that this sucks for me, when she doesn't use logic or common sense in our discussions about it?

Condense the text into a few key points
<bot>: wife doesn't clean up her crap, can't have a rational discussion with her about it without it devolving into a blame game, in which she is in denial about any wrong doing.