<human>: Can you provide a brief overview of the text?

I'm sitting in my car killing some time and I'm checking all the usual social media apps that I use when I'm bored. 
I get to Vine, the last option for when I'm really out of things to do to waste my time, and scroll through the "popular now" clips. Normally, all of these videos are really stupid and pointless. I get to a vine of a "fake phone call" basically, someone holds a phone up to their head while walking in public and says something really weird and records peoples reaction of them. 

I couldn't find the exact vine to post here, but it involved a guy walking by in a supermarket employee while he was on the phone and said "But last time you fucked me in the ass it hurt! And then you shitted on me"

I was bored so I clicked my phone off and headed into the bank. About the time I get to the teller, I check my phone. And at full volume in a dead quiet bank my phone goes off "Last time you fucked me in the ass it hurt! And then you shitted on me". I tried to mute it but it was too late, the damage was done.
<bot>: My phone went off in a silent bank and said "Last time you fucked me in the ass it hurt! And then you shitted on me"