<human>: I have been with my boyfriend since I was 18 years old. We do not live together but it has worked this way for a long time. I do spend 3-4 nights a week at his. In the last 7-8months we have argued alot, had difference of opinions in things, the communication between us has broken down and he takes his emotions and anger out on me. 

Last week a group of us went on holiday and my friend Adam has been known in the past to take drugs but I asked him on a number of occasions not to bring anything away with him, he promised me he wouldnt but in actual fact he did. My boyfriend found out and got angry and upset, he didnt want to tell me at the time because of being away and ended up taken his anger out on me, screaming and shouting abusive language at me, making me feel really low and upset. He kicked the door in anger and hurt is foot. His mood was like this for the last day of the holiday and he  thought by apologising with a long message and telling me how much he loves me will make everything ok.

I saw him 5 days after returning from holiday to talk things through but my feeling were very different to his. He had bought me a huge bouquet of flowers as a 'love you' present. They are very nice but in 8 years I have never had such a big gesture. Is this acceptable? 

I feel stuck and unsure on what to do as he wants to take the next steps in our relationship but I have my doubts. In our time together he has done everything he has wanted to do including working in the USA for 8months and travelling Australia for 2 months 3 years later. I just carried on and waited for him. He is now ready for the next stage in our relationship including moving in together, marriage and children, whereas I am now in the mind set of living my life and doing more for me. How do we move forward? Is it possible?

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: Boyfriend and I have problems communicating, he thinks making big gestures is the way forward but I am unsure and want to live my life.