<human>: We have only been married a year and a half. 

Since before we were married we have talked about swinging and being in situations where we possibly play around with other people. Since getting married we have lightly pursued this, but haven't really had any luck. 

I have recently discovered some conversations between my husband and other girls.  He has taken things into his own hands and started pursuing some relationships without my knowledge.  My husband doesn't really understand my anger and hurt because he thinks that this was the plan all along. 

My vision of the swinging was something that we would do together and share together as a couple, not him just hooking up with random girls. Now that I've discovered this I'm a wreck. I feel constantly anxious and jealous. I work nights, so I always think that when I'm working he's at home sleeping with someone else. My trust is gone. 

I've explained this to him, but he says that the sexual desires he's feeling are very strong and he doesn't think he can live a life of monogamy.  I'm worried that no matter what, he is always going to be a man who will cheat on me. 

I love this man. I don't want to end my marriage. Our life is beautiful and we have complicated wonderful 5 year plans in place.  I don't know how to move past though.

Condense the text into a few key points
<bot>: my husband is having sex with other girls, which he thinks falls under the previous agreement of swinging. I disagree and I'm not handling it well.