<human>: I'm not sure what to do anymore, so I have decided to come here.  I have a wonderful relationship of five years. We have had ups and downs, but we have always overcome them.  I have something though that has continuously bothered me, my non existent sex drive.  I love this man so much, but the thought of having sex now brings me to a panic.  I literally have to prep talk myself for hours to get myself to go to bed and just let it happen...then in the end backing out.  The other night I "went to the bathroom" just long enough for him to fall asleep, because he proposed we should make love.  This feeling has increasingly got worse recently and now I'm avoiding it at all costs.    

Some back story, I have been like this for a long time.  I think our first year things were fine in that department (like most couples), then it decreased over time.  It wasn't until my daughter was born, that the overall thought repulsed me, sent me into panic.  I'm not sure what to do, because I love him and I don't feel like a woman anymore.  I want more kids, but the thought of sex brings this overwhelming feeling over me.  

He says he's "used" to it and it doesn't bother him anymore.  That he doesn't care what is supposed to be normal, because we are us and he loves us.  While I'm thankful for him being understanding, I can't help but to think I am harming our relationship.  I can't help, but to think about what if?  Women have continuously told me he will find some elsewhere, but deep down I know he isn't like that. There has been a lot of stress lately between us with the work and our baby, but beyond that I don't feel the same way about him like I used to.  I feel disconnected.

I know I should consider a therapist, but I'm afraid of how much that could cost when we are already barely squeezing by.  Has anyone been through this?  What is wrong with me?  I hate myself for this.

Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?
<bot>: I have a ton of anxiety about sex and now avoid it at all costs.  I don't WANT to be like this.