<human>: I'm not sure when this started, maybe when I was 24 and my then-bf of a year (26M) left a GChat window open with the comment to his best friend: "Maybe I'm being superficial, but I think I was more compatible looks-wise with [last girl he dated] and [last serious girlfriend]." I wasn't snooping, had simply used his computer (with his permission) to check my email and saw that before logging out of his account. But it hurt. A lot. Especially because a) I have decent self-esteem and consider myself objectively attractive, and b) this bf had repeatedly told me how much he found me beautiful. 

Since then, I've had two other long-term bfs, and in both relationships I found myself comparing my traits (looks, personality, accomplishments) to those guys' ex-gfs. Rationally, I know this is a dumb move: everyone has different strengths and weaknesses, and there's always a reason why those exes became exes. 

My current bf (27M) *never* compares me to any of his ex-gfs, and frequently points out the things he loves about me, including both emotional/intellectual and physical traits. But I still can't shake the feeling that I need to be better than every woman from his past. And I'm not a competitive person (i.e., I don't need to "win" at work or in my relationships with others). 

Thoughts on how to handle this feeling? I already see a professional therapist to discuss anxiety-related issues, so I would appreciate suggestions beyond that.

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<bot>: I constantly compare myself to the ex-girlfriends of men I'm dating, trying not to feel inadequate or insecure.