<human>: Can you give me a shortened version of the text?

So this morning, I wake up, and I'm thinking, "Maybe I should stay in bed today? Today feels like it's going to go... not well."

That's really not like me, so I shook off the ominous feeling, and got out of bed. It's August, and hot in my city, so I went to the bathroom to shower and shave.

...I turn the faucet. No water, just the hiss of air in the pipes. Okay then, no shower for me today. And I guess no laundry, either, though I'm running way low on clean clothes.

I go downstairs, run into our maintenance lady, and she lets me know that she's aware of the problem. Our hot water heater died, and head maintenance guy is shopping around for a new one. Alright, cool.

I go out and get some takeout, because I figure I'm not cooking today. Korean food, root beer, iced tea.

I get home, sit down in front of my computer, check Reddit, and just as I'm twisting the cap on my root beer, I think "maybe I should've picked up some bottled wate-"

FWOooOSHHHHhhhh.

This root beer. This... this root beer, guys. I'd maybe turned the cap a quarter turn, and the whole bottle turns to fizz. A third of it oozes out before I can reseal it.

So much root beer on my pants, shirt, desk, floor, and everything else in the vicinity. And I have no clean water in the house. Normally I'd just suck it up and start cleaning, but I stared at this carnage for a full minute, thinking, "...what do I even do?"

I've got the floor and desk pretty clean (using a bottle of two year old emergency water and 409), and I guess I'm gonna head to the corner store for clean water now. Wish me luck!
<bot>: No running water, already feel sticky from the summer heat, decided it was a perfect time to cover my bedroom in a fine mist of rootbeer.