<human>: So I work for an international corporation. I show up for work on Thursday and this is when it all went down. 

Obligatory background:

The Lab I work in doesn't have enough parking so the pleb scientists have to park streetside to make room for marketing. Fuck those assholes. Anyway, I have a spot I'm always in because I show up early and it's super close to the building. 

So, I show up to work and king douche is parked behind the first car in a 3-car-long segment of prime parking real estate in front of the building. Fuckhead McDouchenugget is EASILY taking up two spots, leaving juuuuuust enough room for me to pull up behind him and have my back end hanging out into the exit. So like any scientist running low on caffeine and patience at 6am, I pull up to within half an inch of his bumper. 

I get out, check the distance, and so does he. 

"I normally don't nitpick, but I think you nudged me there"

Suck my dick, I think, and fuck you. I know I didn't touch your car. 

I say sorry, offer to trade insurance, he declines, I go to work. 3 hours later our quarterly town hall meeting starts and who is there? None other than king douche leading things off. 

I hid in the back and stared at my notepad for 2 hours. I'm sure he saw me. I'm still waiting for the hammer to drop.

Can you give me the gist of the text in a nutshell?
<bot>: was an ass to a douche by parking suuuuuuper close. Turns out he's the regional manager of my company. I'm drinking to forget currently.