<human>: Can you condense the text into three sentences or less?

Hi everyone! I've been lurking here the past couple of months to learn (correct me if I'm wrong) that STDs go about 6-9 months before the date, and invitations go out 2 months ahead (with 1 month response before following up), and with 2 weeks left, update the caterer with headcount (roughly).

I was telling a friend about the timing, and she had a different perspective. She thinks it's best to send the invitations out 8 months in advance with a 2 month deadline for responding. This gives everyone advance warning so they can plan around it. The +1 would also be reserved for them if they respond yes, whether or not they have someone.

She had a friend who held her wedding in Germany with most of the guests from the US. The friend sent invitations out 8 months with 2 month deadline for responding. My friend's point of view is "it's understandable because it's in Germany for her to do that, but why wouldn't it be even if you were holding it nearby?" 

I have no idea why not! For 20 out of our 100 guests, it would be a  "destination" wedding for them. We would send them invitations 8 months in advance (so they know where it's located in order to do their planning and save for travel).

We then went through some rough scenarios: People have emergencies and cancel last minute - that's very understandable and could happen even if sent 2 months in advance. What if someone responds yes but later finds out a close family member's baby shower is the same day? She believes because they responded yes to you, they should decline the baby shower. 

My friend was pointing out - why can't a guest look at the calendar, see that it's empty, pencil it in, then if something else comes up (a concert, a party, etc) decline that one? If they want to come, they should say yes. If they don't want to come, they should say no, not wait until last minute for the best events to choose between.

I was speechless. I have no idea why not?
<bot>: I'd like to know the reasoning of sending invitations 2 months out instead of 8 months out. Why is it acceptable for destination wedding but not as acceptable for somewhere close by?