<human>: Ok, first of all I apologize if this is the wrong place to post this but its not about the rape flashback itself. It's about my relationship now that I have had this embarrassing moment.

Background: My boyfriend and I have a great sexual relationship. We are comfortable with each other and are able to really experiment and enjoy ourselves no matter what. We have been in a relationship for over a year but having sex for almost 2 years.

More background: I was raped about 12 years ago. My boyfriend was well aware of this incident.

Last night we were having really rough sex and something happened and must have triggered something in my brain that connected it with the negative experience I had as a teenager and I completely disconnected myself from my boyfriend. We continued, we finished, my body enjoyed itself but I wasn't really there. When it was over I was distant and couldn't look him in the eye and then when he asked me what was wrong I just cried.

Im worried, not about myself (I have been dealing with this for years and I know how to handle myself), but about my boyfriend. He felt awful and now I'm afraid that our relationship will change, possibly for the worst, since now our sexual intimacy may be awkward. I told him the best thing to do is to not treat me differently, let me handle it myself and lets try and just continue. I don't know if that is something he will be able to do and I'm just looking for a male perspective on this situation.

I'm not looking to bring baggage into this relationship. This is not his problem. I just want things to stay as they were. Any insight on this would be great, thank you.

Can you condense the text into a few key points?
<bot>: Had some sort of rape flashback during rough sex with my boyfriend of 1 year last night and had a little break down after. Worried this will ruin our relationship/scare him off. He was already aware of my experience.