<human>: Teachers, mentors, supervisors, parents, all say I have an attention issue. I have done well to avoid medication and maintain a professional life. However I have lapses in my intention and concentration (adhd?), and I think I have more time to do things than I really do. Then I go into auto pilot and self indulge in laziness. 

This is causing problems because my spouse is getting fed up with being let down.

She sites other instances of my behavior as not caring. When she isn't upset with my "lapses" so to speak. I am usually the center of praise. I am "caring, loving, humanitarian, work hard, smart, loyal". I don't think I am reliable however. Even though I've made VAST improvements. I may have to move onto medication. Has anyone felt these inner struggles.  

It is as if I am perfect for her in every way but the deal breaker is my reliability.. And, I wouldn't get so upset and cry about how much I mess up if I DIDN'T care-- so the next logical option is to supplement my deficiencies with medication right?

I want this relationship to work. But, I wonder if something is considered drastic or realistic. I often lie about my attention and listening habits because I am afraid of admitting I am having a hard time concentrating and her thinking I don't care.

Can you summarize the given text in a few sentences?
<bot>: I am a perfect fit for my fiance' but there is a catch, I am not reliable so everything else to her might become moot. I need advice concerning medication/ how to be more supportive as a partner.