<human>: Dating 5 months. I can't tell whether I'm being paranoid or not. I would appreciate everyone's advice, especially from former Socially Awkward Penguins. 

Basically, I really like my BF - I'll call him David. I love his personality and character, even if he is very shy and a socially awkward penguin and very introverted. 

However, it's been recently dawning on me that he may not like me for who I am, but just for a girlfriend. I asked if i could read his old journals (he said yes) and I was really shocked by how much he put himself down for not having dated anyone. He also goes through a torrent of crushes and longing and seems to be in love with the idea of devoting yourself to someone and being in love, instead of loving the person for their qualities. 

I am beginning to realize that he had a LOT lower self esteem than I previously thought when I met him. I was the one who asked him out, which makes me even more nervous when I'm considering this. I am starting to think that he said yes just because he was desperate to date someone, anyone. I am his first everything, first kiss etc and I am wondering if he is idealizing our relationship and not liking me for who I am. He also said "I love you" almost a month into the relationship which made me really taken aback. Other things include a general uninterest in the things I find interesting eg hobbies and aspirations. 

How can I find out the truth? What should I do. Please give me your advice!

Can you give me a shortened version of the text?
<bot>: I have a sinking feeling SAP BF wants to be with me just because he wants a GF and the feeling of being in love, not because he loves me