<human>: Hi Weddit! We just got engaged last month, working on our guest list now. We picked our venue and it will hold 180, so that's not a problem. $$ wise, we would prefer to keep the number of people actually at the wedding at no more than 130. 

So here is the problem I am having. We have approximately 50 family guests from each side (so 100) and then 50 more friend guests on our "A List" must invite for 150 total invited. Fine. 

But, we have been told by both my mother and my mother in law that they think the majority of those family guests will not come (ex, my FMIL said 6 of her 50 would "probably come"). This is not an emotional issue or anything for me or FH. We are not offended or upset. We understand that people don't want to drive and stay overnight (my family, ~4 hour drive) and that people cannot afford to fly halfway across the country for our wedding (his family, flying from the Midwest to Upstate NY).

My issue is, that there are other people (mostly friends, but some parents of friends, etc) that I would like to invite. BUT - I am worried that somehow these family members will come and we will all of sudden have 170 people at our wedding. 

I have been thinking about doing a B List, but everyone will know that STDs have gone out and I don't want anyone to feel they are second fiddle. Because in actuality, they aren't second fiddle. While I know/have met all these family members I really don't care whether they are at my wedding - however, I am happy to invite them and will be happy to see them if they came. It's more of a familial obligation thing and one I am happy to meet. 

Basically, how risky do you think it would be to invite the extra friends at the beginning? Do you think we can trust our mothers saying people aren't going to come? Has anyone dealt with a similar problem where you are inviting a significant number of people that were categorized as "invite them but they won't make it"?

Provide a brief overview of the text.
<bot>: how do you deal with inviting lots of people that "probably won't come" when trying to be realistic with guest lists, head counts, and budgets?