<human>: Could you distill the essence of the text into 1-3 sentences?

So,this morning started off like a normal saturday. I got up, showered, and had breakfast. After consuming my morning meal I decide to watch movies online - and browse reddit of course (shout out to r/motorcycles) - and continue to drink orange juice. A half gallon (1.8L) of delicious goodness to be exact. After the movie I found myself to have a pee boner. 

Now, most guys know how hard it can be to pee with an erect pee boner. For the ladies that don't know - it ends up being a guessing game, between the distance and angle of said boner. It is sort of like a water fountain arc, while moving back and forth as the pressure builds and diminishes. It's sort of like a carnival game of sorts.

For whatever reason, I decide just to arc the pee slowly into the sink. As I start everything seems to be going well - as I am pinching the "hose" to keep the pressure down. Now this is whee things go bad. I start to feel pressure building, then starting to sting/burn. So I let the flow go to max capacity. The stream shots up in the air, and goes on me, and all over the sink and mirror. (insert runaway hose gif here) I peed on myself and all over the sink. Don't try to pee in the sink guys.
<bot>: Drank a LOT of orange juice, got massive pee boner, decided to pee in sink, went everywhere - including on me