<human>: Condense the text into a few key points

One Time My Girlfriend at the time and I were fooling around in my bed. We didn't have sex, just grinding and kissing. She got tired and said she wanted to take a nap. I was pretty tired as well so we both snuggled up and fell asleep.
 I woke up from a dead sleep about an hour later because of a wet dream I had. I was inches away from my girlfriend and I had Jizz filled underpants on. I slowly scooted away from her trying not to wake her up. I couldn't see behind me because I was laying down and I did not want to move to much and wake her up. so I reached behind me on my dresser and found some fabric. I immediately put in my underpants trying to clean up myself. after I had cleaned myself to the best of my ability I decided to see what I was using. I pulled out and I was instantly filled with terror. It was her $30 Designer made head band she bought in New York  A few months Prior. 
She started to wake up so I threw the Head band across my room. My girlfriend started to move closer to me cause she wanted to keep fooling around. I am now in a horrible spot, I needed to go change my shorts and I was to afraid to tell her what had happened. So I told her I really needed to pee and I jumped out of the bed and pretended to grab my phone, But I really grabbed the headband, and went to the bathroom and changed. 
Later that day when she was about to leave she started asking about her headband. I told her I had not seen it, and that I would look for it when she left. I really knew where it was. It was in the bottom of the bathroom trash can. covered in my potential children. 
Later that night when I told her I had not found it she was very very mad. I couldn't bring myself to tell her what had happened.
<bot>: I had a wet dream and used my GF's really expensive Headband to clean myself then lied that I had not seen her headband all day.