on thanksgiving, americans sat down to dinner, looked at the big turkey and thought about donald trump. o.k., that was totally the wrong attitude. we<u+2019>re supposed to be having a reset. the president-elect has been going out of his way to build bridges. he came to the times this week for a long conversation, during which he was extremely amiable. he blasted the alt-right twits who celebrated his victory with nazi salutes. (<u+201c>of course i condemn. i disavow and condemn.<u+201d>) he had nothing but praise for barack obama (<u+201c>i really liked him a lot.<u+201d>) he has no desire to see hillary clinton prosecuted. (<u+201c>she went through a lot. and suffered greatly in many different ways.<u+201d>) policywise, he was still the guy who<u+2019>s not all that into position papers. in discussing climate change alone, trump used the phrase <u+201c>open mind<u+201d> seven times. this is one thing you can count on. we haven<u+2019>t had a mind so open in the white house since warren harding. trump certainly hasn<u+2019>t been giving many hints about what he<u+2019>s actually going to do. but the real, and very important, message from his outreach was to remind the nation that he<u+2019>s not crazy. trump not crazy! the word spread throughout the land. the stock market soared. while it<u+2019>s true that the country has generally expected a little more from an incoming president, this election year has always been the story of a very low bar. look at his appointments. in another year, people might question whether gov. nikki haley of south carolina would be the right choice for united nations ambassador, since she has virtually no experience whatsoever in foreign affairs. however, given the fact that last week haley appeared to be a finalist for secretary of state, the u.n. seems like an eminently sensible assignment. plus, once again we are relieved it<u+2019>s not rudy giuliani. ironically, trump, who ran as the big-change guy, is spending his first days as president-elect trying to assure people the changes won<u+2019>t be too large. the mexican wall is going to be a mixture of wall and fences <u+2014> think of it as the great wence. the war on illegal immigrants is going to be all about deporting criminals, which is exactly what the obama administration has been doing for years. the most astonishing moment in trump<u+2019>s visit to the times came when the president-elect announced that waterboarding suspected terrorists was <u+201c>not going to make the kind of a difference that maybe a lot of people think.<u+201d> those people would include all the folks who went to trump rallies and cheered when the candidate said things like: <u+201c>would i approve waterboarding? you bet your ass i would. <u+2026> it works.<u+201d> <u+201c>if it<u+2019>s so important to the american people, i would go for it,<u+201d> said the man who spent much of the last year trying to make it important. but, he said, he<u+2019>d talked to gen. james mattis <u+2014> the odds-on bet for secretary of defense <u+2014> and found that mattis thought waterboarding was pretty useless and much less effective than trying to win over a prisoner with cigarettes and beer. now, you can look at this two ways. one is that we have a president-elect who never bothered to talk with any experts about one of his major campaign themes. the other is that he<u+2019>s growing into the job. let<u+2019>s take the second. sure, we<u+2019>ll probably be disappointed by valentine<u+2019>s day, but it could get us through the holidays. i<u+2019>ve been trying to think of a way to set an example <u+2014> to come up with an olive branch that doesn<u+2019>t go overboard. some little thing to smooth the edges before we start fighting about the supreme court and health care. over the past couple of years i have noted on several occasions that donald trump once sent me a letter saying i had the face of a dog. this was when he took exception to my description of him as a <u+201c>thousandaire.<u+201d> i<u+2019>ve decided i will refrain from mentioning the incident again until he does something really, really terrible as president. in the name of accuracy, however, i have to correct the record. i dug out trump<u+2019>s missive the other day and discovered he did not actually say i looked like a dog. he said i was <u+201c>a dog and a liar<u+201d> with the face of a pig. hard to believe i got that wrong. the moral is that you should always consult the primary source. so off we go. fiscal conservatives are terrified that trump will spend a ton of money on construction projects and refuse to cut entitlements. murmurs of the dread term <u+201c>rockefeller republican<u+201d> are probably wafting at paul ryan<u+2019>s holiday table. perhaps liberals can take comfort in the fact that the other side is just as freaked out as they are. next year at this time, we<u+2019>ll be watching president trump pardon the thanksgiving turkeys. unless he reverts and winds up ordering the turkeys tortured. nicholas kristof is off today. i invite you to join me on facebook . follow the new york times opinion section on facebook and twitter (@nytopinion) , and sign up for the opinion today newsletter . a version of this op-ed appears in print on november 24, 2016, on page a31 of the new york edition with the headline: carving donald trump. today's paper | subscribe
carving donald trump
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